User blog:MrTyeDye/Fanfiction: Shrinkin' Lincoln (Part 6)

Someone pointed out that I never got around to posting Parts 6 and 7 of Shrinkin' Lincoln here. Better late than never, I guess.

"Kids? Dinner's ready!"

The voice of Rita from downstairs sent all off the younger Loud children into a frenzy. In a fit of panic, Lisa snatched up Lincoln, ran over to Lola's bed and shoved him under her comforter.

"Mercy me, how did I not anticipate this?!" cried Lisa. "We're going to have to think of an alibi."

"Like what?!" demanded Lana.

"I don't know! Something!"

While all of this was going on, Lincoln wished he could do something to help, but his mom would be coming up the stairs any minute and he didn't want to risk detection. The only thing he could do was make himself scarce, curl up in that silky pitch black cocoon that Lisa stuffed him into, and pray that his sisters knew what they were doing. His heart skipped a beat and a knot formed in his stomach once he heard the clink of the twins' doorknob twisting and the creak of the door opening.

"Girls? I said dinner's ready. Come down before it gets cold."

"We will, mother," said Lisa. "But I should inform you that Lincoln will not be joining us tonight."

"Oh? And why is that?" asked Rita.

Lincoln's knot tightened itself once he heard the other girls start running their mouths, tripping over themselves in a disorganized attempt to come up with a plausible explanation.

"He's sick!" said Lola.

"He's studying!" said Lucy.

"He's sick of studying!" said Lana.

"Girls, girls, girls, one at a time!" exclaimed Rita. "Now, why exactly can't Lincoln come down to dinner?"

"Well, he-" began Lana, only for Lisa to cut her off.

"He has a very difficult math examination on Monday," said Lisa. "He spent all day studying for it and now he's very tired and fatigued. He needs his rest."

What followed was one of the most tense, suspenseful, uncomfortable silences that Lincoln had ever experienced. Every one of his bodily systems seemed to lock and freeze; his heart stopped, his breathing ceased and his throat started to close up, all while he silently pleaded for Rita to give a response. Any response.

"You know, I was wondering why I hadn't seen him all day," said Rita. "Good for him, though. Glad he's taking his schoolwork so seriously."

Lincoln sighed with relief as his body relaxed itself and resumed its natural pace.

"And don't worry about leaving him hungry," Lola chimed in. "We'll bring up some food to his room after dinner."

"Aw, you girls are so sweet," said Rita. "Anyway, let's get the rest of you downstairs. Your father's waiting for you."

The next thing Lincoln heard was a flurry of ever-softening footsteps, followed by the click of the door closing behind them. Tentatively, he pushed the covers away from him and peeked out from under them, to find that the room was indeed empty.

Close call, he thought.

With nothing to do but wait, he wrapped himself up in Lola's covers, lay his head against her pillow, and started resting his eyes.

Lincoln was woken up about a half hour later, to the scent of steamed vegetables and legumes wafting down the hall.

Ah, yes, he thought. Succotash Saturday.

The door opened to reveal all five of his younger sisters, two of whom (Lola and Lana) were holding a plate of warm succotash, that still had a tiny plume of steam rising from it.

"Oh, hey, girls!" called Lincoln, as he rose to his feet to greet them. "Thanks for the food!"

"Eh, it wasn't nothin', Tiny Linc," said Lana. She walked over towards the bed and set the plate down on top of it, prompting a dirty look from Lola.

"Not on my bed, thank you very much," she snapped. She took the plate in one hand and Lincoln in the other, and lowered them both onto the floor.

"Well, excuuuuse me, princess," Lana muttered under her breath.

It was only when the plate was set right in front of him that the sheer size of the portion became apparent. It was almost big enough for him to bathe in.

"Hey, Lana? You don't expect me to eat all of this, do you?"

"Nah," said Lana. "I just brought up a whole plate so mom and dad wouldn't get suspicious. You can just pick at it and I'll give the rest to Tori."

"Oh, okay then."

Lincoln walked up to the plate, picked out a sweet pepper and started nibbling on it. The pepper was so moist and tender that his mouth nearly overflowed with its juices every time he bit into it. Lynn Sr. wasn't the most exciting chef around, but he knew how to cook a vegetable.

"Be sure to eat a bean or two, so you get some protein," said Lana. "Don't you want to be big and strong, like me?"

Lincoln gave her a deadpan look. "Lana, you do realize I'm going to be two heads taller than you tomorrow morning."

Lana just chuckled and gave him a playful little poke in the belly. "Oh, lighten up, Tiny Linc. I'm just messing with you."

Lincoln rolled his eyes and went back to his meal, picking out his favorite parts of the succotash and scarfing them down. After polishing off a few more peppers, a couple of beans and three kernels of corn, he wiped his mouth clean and collapsed onto his back, thoroughly stuffed.

"That's enough for me," he uttered. "You can just bag up the rest."

After that, he just lied back and watched Lana empty the contents of the plate into Tori's food container. Gosh, it's going to take her an hour to finish all that, he thought, tickled by the memory of Tori's absurdly sluggish eating habits.

Once Lana slid the container back under her bed, he began to speak again.

"Boy, we've had quite a day today, haven't we?"

"We certainly have, Lincoln," said Lisa, as she approached her prone brother and crouched down over him. "I must say, you've impressed me tremendously."

Lincoln raised an eyebrow at her. "How so?"

"Even after I miniaturized your body, you refused to let your diminutive size keep you from fulfilling your promises to your three sisters. A lesser brother would have used the accident as an excuse to procrastinate. But you, Lincoln, are no lesser brother."

Lincoln's heart swelled with pride at Lisa's remarks, until it rivaled the size it possessed before the accident. By the end of the day, he had learned how to feed Lana's pets, provided Lucy with a contest-winning poem (hopefully), and lifted Lola's spirits, all at a height below that of a kitten. He had every reason to be proud of himself.

And if he didn't realize that before, he certainly did once Lana spoke up.

"Let's hear it for Tiny Linc!" she cheered. "Ti-ny Linc! Ti-ny Linc! Ti-ny Linc! Ti-ny Linc!"

She was soon joined by Lola, followed by Lisa, and then Lucy. Even Lily joined in on the chant ("Na Nee Wink!")

That mass display of appreciation left Lincoln feeling so elated that he wished he could grow back to normal right that second, just so he'd be big enough to give all five of his kid sisters the hugs they deserved. For the moment, all he could do was lie back, reflect on the day and bask in his accomplishments.

After the merriment died down, it occurred to Lisa that bedtime was fast approaching for all of them - and if they had to go to bed, Lincoln would have to as well. As such, she and her sisters worked together to walk their bite-sized brother through his evening routine. In lieu of a regular shower, the five of them let him wash himself in the sink while they guarded the door. Lola provided him with a set of pajamas, courtesy of her "Sleepy Time Barbie & Ken" playset. Lincoln would have preferred something a little more dignified than a white undershirt and some sweat pants, but he wasn't one to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Lincoln decided that he wanted to sleep in Lisa's room, just so she wouldn't have to go fetch him the next morning when the machine was recharged. For his bed, Lisa lay a spare pillow atop her chemistry table and draped a washcloth over it.

"It's not much," she said, "but it should be comfortable enough to sleep on for one night."

"Oh, trust me, I'm not complaining," said Lincoln, as he slipped under the washcloth and curled himself into a ball. "Thanks for laying this out for me."

But just as he was getting settled in, he couldn't help but notice that the crib on the opposite side was empty.

"By the way, where's Lily?" he asked.

"She's being given a bath," said Lisa. "By the way, just as a warning, mom will be coming in any minute to tuck her in."

Just a few seconds after Lisa said that, a knock came on the door. Lincoln peeked out from under the washcloth, fully prepared to hide back under it if it was one of his parents or older sisters. To his relief, after Lisa opened the door he saw Lucy, Lola and Lana pile into the room.

"Can we do something for Lincoln before he goes to bed?" asked Lola. "We'll be quick about it, I promise."

Lisa sighed, rolled her eyes and pointed them towards the chemistry table. "Proceed."

The three of them walked right up to the table, with Lucy leading the way and the twins flanking her. Lincoln threw off the washcloth, hopped off the pillow and walked to the edge of the table to greet them, ready for whatever they had planned for him.

Lucy reached over, picked him up, lifted him to her face and gave him a kiss that enveloped his left cheek.

"Good night, Lincoln."

Lucy then passed him over to Lola, who kissed him on his right cheek.

"Good night, Lincoln."

Finally, he was passed to Lana, who capped it all off by kissing his forehead.

"Good night, Tiny Linc."

The three girls, having left him feeling warmer and fuzzier than ever, placed him back on the table, where he retook his spot on the pillow and draped the washcloth back over himself. It was moments like these that reminded him how privileged he was to be a member of the Loud family.

"I assume you are ready for slumber?"

Lincoln responded with a muttered, "Mm-hmm," already feeling the effects of drowsiness overtake him.

"I suspected as much."

Lisa walked over to the doorway, flicked the lights off and returned to her bed.

As he drifted deeper and deeper into unconsciousness, he could faintly hear the sound of Rita coming in to put Lily in her crib. He paid her no heed, partially because he was too sleep-addled to worry about being found out, and partially because he was confident that Lisa wouldn't let that happen. For the next five hours, his sleep cycle went on uninterrupted.

Then, in the middle of the night, he was stirred by some troubled-sounding murmurs coming from the other side of the room. He groggily flung off his covers and forced himself into a sitting position, trying to scan the room for the source of the disturbance. Once he got himself oriented, he determined that the noise was coming from Lily's crib, or at least somewhere in that vicinity. Through the thick, murky fog of darkness, he could just barely make out an outline of a restless infant, tossing and turning and wriggling about.

Oh, geez, Lily must be having a nightmare, thought Lincoln.

He probably could have tuned out the noise if he really tried to, but the thought of his baby sister being tormented was tearing him up inside. Besides, she'd probably start crying once she did wake up. What was he to do?

Normally, the solution to the problem would be a no-brainer for him. He'd been woken up by Lily's nighttime whimpering before, and when that happened, he'd just reach into her crib and slip Bun-Bun into her arms, which usually settled her down. As of now, though, Bun-Bun was too big for him to carry, and he wasn't even sure where he had left her last. He wouldn't feel comfortable waking up Lisa just to make her dig around his room for a stuffed toy.

Then, somehow, his drowsy, groggy brain produced an idea. He couldn't give her Bun-Bun, but he could give her someone else. Someone a little bit smaller, but just as warm and almost as cuddly.

In a remarkable display of brazenness (or maybe he was just too tired to properly assess risk), he jumped off the table and landed right onto Lisa's bed, landing with a whump. As soon as the bed stopped wobbling from the impact, he stumbled to his feet and lumbered over to the dozing genius. As he approached her enormous face, he was buffeted by gusts of hot air emanating from her nose with each exhalation. Undeterred, Lincoln walked right up and started poking Lisa in the cheek.

"Hey, Lisa! Lisa!"

Lisa's eyes fluttered open. "What is it, Lincoln?" she muttered.

"Can you take me to Lily's crib?"

Lisa's eyelids started to drift back together. "What possible purpose would that serve?"

"She's having a nightmare," said Lincoln. "I think she'll feel better if she has someone to snuggle with."

Lisa's eyes flapped back open, and a smile formed on her face. "You're a good brother, Lincoln."

After giving her body a good stretch, Lisa hopped off the bed, picked Lincoln up by the collar and carried him over to Lily's crib. The baby's whimpering grew louder and louder the closer he got, making his heart ache.

Once Lily got to the other side, she slipped Lincoln through the bars, bid him good night and returned to her bed. Lincoln, not wanting to see his baby sister upset for a moment more, walked over to Lily and slid himself right into her arms. As soon as he was in her grasp, he could hear her cries start to diminish in both frequency and volume, until they finally disappeared altogether.

He had to admit that Lily made a pretty comfortable sleep partner. Those layers of baby fat made her body so soft and cushy, and there was something soothing about the way her diaper would crinkle when she wriggled around in her sleep. That, and he liked the feeling of falling asleep in the grasp of someone so much bigger than he was, since it reassured him that there was someone looking out for him and protecting him. In the arms of his big baby sister, he couldn't have felt safer.

Lincoln had one final thought before he let himself fall back into the sweet embrace of sleep:

You know, in a weird way, I think I'm going to miss being small.

To be concluded...