Thread:Kikka24moon/@comment-24669562-20190715124839

I tried to answer your comment on the Harold McBride page but it wouldn't let me and now I cannot leave any comments on the Harold McBride page. It even looks like I'm not logged in when I'm on that page but I am logged in on other parts of this wikia. My answer is in italics:

''I don't remember hearing that anywhere. It's just that in my life I've never heard a man call his son, "Honey," "sweety," "Pumpkin," and I never heard the words "Apple Head" or "Peanut", especially not the former, used as nicknames ("Apple Head" is a new one to me!) Plus neither of my fathers (no they're not gay, one of them was my mother's boyfriend, which is how I was born, and my stepfather went as far as to marry my mother) called me "Honey," and they never would have done that, epecially not my stepfather!''

''My stepfather had this rule about me acting a certain way, telling me what boys do/don't do and what girls do. Now I know a lot of what he said was nonsense! He told me things like "Boys don't put their hands on their hips" although I've seen him do it, "Boys don't put their hands up, girls do" when I was trying to cover my ears (Loud noises scaed me and still do to this day), "boys don't say 'eww,' girls do," although I've heard him say that too! My stepfather also didn't approve of homosexuality. And I couldn't contradict him because, well, he was my father and he would hit me or punish me some other way if I tried to contradict him or argue with him (I was scared of him and can you blame me? He was very very strict! And admittedly I still live with animosity and resentment toward him! ...and others. One I time I did snap off and mouth off at him! He also hated it when I cried but I was a very emotional and disturbed person, plus I have autism, which made me what I was and makes me what I am now! I even tried saying things like "I can't help it" but my stepfather said he didn't take those "excuses," and not all of them were excuses, but I didn't know how to make him see that! Plus my stepfather refused to buy me a purple notebook becaue purple was a girl-color, and made me get a less-attactive color (I wanted red but they didn't have one.) I told my mother about it recently and she said "That's petty!"''

It's not all my stepfather's fault though, his uncles raised him that way too (his father was dead so other male relatives raised him. I blame them for messing him up and making him believe what he does, and he's a difficult person to live with. You wouldn't like him either! I'm still not close to him and I'm sorry, not to sound prideful or disrepectful but I'd rather be homeless than live with him again!)

''My mother and half-sister seemed to support him too, especially my sister. she repeated to me what my stepfather said about what girls do that boys don't do thing, which I later stopped caring about. I was even told I couldn't have male celeberties hanging on my wall because it was "gay" to do so. I had a poster of Aaron Carter on my wall but my mother or sister took it down and told me people would think I was gay if I had that! I didn't agree with that, didn't care, and I didn't see that as a big deal, but appaently it was! I wanted to say something about that but I couldn't come up with anything, I was speechless, at a loss fo words! so I figured they were right, and admittedly I was an easy target for bullies and I hated being bullied, so I had to be in the closet with a lot of things and had to not be myself, which was a drag! so I only had female celeberties on my wall. And I've been accused of being gay myself, which I'm not! some, maybe much of what I did or wanted to do was considered gay! And I had, and still kind of have, a fear of being judged, or misjudged! And I'm very sensitive too!''

''I once called my stepfather "Honey" but my mother told me not to do that. And even to this day I still wouldn't call him or any male person "Honey" or "sweety" even if it a just a compliment and even if I had good intentions (I'd feel eird about that anyay!) My mother also told me not to call males "pretty," not even their outfits "pretty" and yelled at me fo doing so, although it was just my opinion! And I couldn't express myelf real well and even still to this day I cannot express myelf well!''

Mind you, this was back in the 90s and ealy 2000s and I was a kid and teen then!

''Now though, my mother is more understanding of me than she was before and understands me better than my stepfather and sister do! There are some things she still doesn't want me to do and she's right. some things I also cannot do for religous reasons! Okay that's weak! I'll say, "there are things I cannot do because they are scripturally wrong."''

''I didn't agree with a lot of what was said to me but I went along with it for the sake of peace and to avoid punishment. sadly though I even tried to get others not to do things becaue of how I was raised and because some of what they did really was wrong, but they would get mad at me, and my parents even told me to mind my business, which I do try to do now.''

''But I never heard men call their sons "Honey," "sweety" or other names males and females call each other and I wasn't raised to do that! some of it I do agree with but lots of it I don't. I've also learned just because it's okay for others to do something doesn't mean it's okay for me to do too, again, even if I mean well!''

''It wasn't easy for me! I couldn't be myself, I had to act certain ways, and I had to be denied/ deprived of some things, even deny myself things! I know my parents and sister and others were only trying to protect me and look out for my best interests, and for that I should be thankful, but it still doesn't completely change how I feel! I should also try to leave the past behind, stop living in the past and move on and let go, but some things still bother me and I will never completely get over them, they will bother me until my dying day! And even if you well-meaning people try to tell me things like "That's in the past! Get Over It! Grow Up! Move On!" Maybe it's true and you're right, you're not going to help me, you're only going to make me feel worse! If you think I'm immature, fine, think I'm immature but, well, let's just agree to disagree, I hate confrontations and I hate arguing with, being mean/ rude/ disrespectful, offensive to other people. And I do try to be forgiving and should too, especially if I want to be forgiven, and I do want to be, but it's not always easy to do! But not being forgiving is also unscriptural!''

''And I too agree there are some things males shouldn't do and things females shouldn't do, some of it is my opinion by the way, but I cannot control what others do and I don't have the right to dictate what others do! Even I don't like it when people dictate what I do!''

''I am sorry if I sounded like a jerk and if I was or sounded immatue in any way, and if I gave any of you a bad impession of myself! I know a lot of you are not going to understand me and are going to hold me to high(er) standards!'' 