Slice of Life/Script

(we open on a scene from one of Lincoln's manga comics; two characters are having a confrontation, and they "speak" in Lincoln's voice)

CHARACTER #1: If we cannot decide who gets the triangle of power, then we must...

CHARACTER #2: BATTLE!!!

(the two characters power up and leap toward a pizza-shaped artifact and shout "YAAAHHHHHHH!!" as the caption is spelled out)

(cut to Lincoln on his bed reading a manga comic)

LINCOLN: Ah, nothing like a little manga-reading before dinner.

MOM: (offscreen) KIDS, PIZZA'S HERE!

(cut to an exterior view of the house; a pizza delivery truck is seen driving away)

(cut to Lincoln walking down the stairway)

LINCOLN: In a family this big...

(Lincoln moves to the side of the stairway to avoid his sisters stampeding down; Lana then comes sliding down the banister)

LANA: OOH, PIZZA PIZZA PIZZA, YEEES!

LINCOLN: ...gettings seconds is rare. [runs down]

(cut to a pizza box getting set down on the dining room table)

LINCOLN: Especially when it comes to pizza.

(Lincoln opens the box to reveal a pizza pie; he and his sisters reach in and take out a slice each, leaving only one remaining)

LINCOLN: With twelve slices and eleven kids, there's always one slice left. Who gets the last slice? Well, thats always the problem. Let me tell you about..."Lincoln Loud's ABCs to Getting the Last Slice". (the title appears as he speaks it) First, "A"; we argue.

LORI: I'm the oldest, so I should get it!

LOLA: No way! Beauty before age!

LANA: Oh, then I guess I should get it.

LYNN: You don't eat it! You'll just eat your boogers instead!

LANA: Hmm, true.

LUAN: This is bad news anyway you slice it. (laughs) Get it?

LILY: (blows a rasperry in response to Luan's joke)

LUCY: I know. We'll just contact the spirits and have them decide.

LUNA: Dude, dinner's kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you.

LISA: Perhaps I can use my calipers to equally measure us all a piece.

LENI: Who needs caterpillars. All we have to do is split it evenly 40/40.

LINCOLN: Arguing never works. So if we can't decide who gets the last slice, it brings us to "B"; we must...

(in his imagination, Lincoln spins around and is enveloped in shiny rays of light; the light breaks away to reveal Lincoln in a manga-esque form)

LINCOLN: BATTLE!

(images of manga versions of the Loud sisters appear; they shout as they circle the pizza slice and jump for it)

(cut to the exterior view of the house)

DAD: (offscreen) KIDS! There's no need to fight!

(cut back to the dining room; the kids, in reality, are piled on top of each other from their fight; Dad shows them a second pizza box and opens it)

MOM: (offscreen) We got a second pizza for free!

LINCOLN: Of course we always forget about "C"; coupons.

(the kids zip out of the scene, causing the one slice to drop to the floor)

(Charles walks in, sniffs the slice and perpares to eat it, but is met with glares from Charles, Walt and Geo)

(in imagination, like before, the pets assume fantastic manga forms and leap toward the slice)