User blog:Steven A. Lucas/Steven Lucas in The Loud House: The Price of Admission (FANFIC)

Hello. Steven again. It's almost a few days 'til Halloween. Right now, I'm releasing a Halloween-based episode The Price of Admission. I've added some of my scenes involving me like telling Lincoln not to see the movie without parents' permission, and of course me watching a late night movie marathon. In this version, I told Lincoln he can't see the movie because it's rated R, like how most horror movies are. I really hope you enjoy it. Plus, I do not own the rights of the show. Enjoy!

The Price of Admission

Originally Written by Sheela Shrinivas

Re-Written by Steven Lucas

[Episode begins with a trailer of The Harvester opening up with a dismal farmer.] Narrator: "He was a humble farmer until a drought ravaged his land." [the farmlands have dried out and a tumbleweed passes by.] "Now, he's found a new crop..." [the farmer suddenly starts killing innocent victims with his scythe and harvesting their organs in a cooler.] "...human organs! He is...The Harvester! Opens this Friday."

''[The title of the movie is bloodstained on the blade of the scythe. In the living room, Lincoln has shown Steven the trailer on his phone.]''

Steven: Whoa! That movie looks so scary, it’ll make every scary movie character wet their pants.

Lincoln: You can say that again! I want to see this movie so bad, that my friends will talk about it when they see it.

Steven: I’m not sure about that Lincoln, this movie is rated R. It may contain content that is too scary for younger viewers. You know, it’s not suitable for children under the age of 17, unless they are accompanied by a parent or guardian.

Lincoln: Come on Steven, you are older than Lori! You’ve seen some scary movies before.

Steven: Yeah, that’s true. I mean, I’m not a huge horror movie fan. I’ve seen a lot of R-rated movies that are either horror, comedy, drama, suspense, and action.

Lincoln: Okay, I get the idea. But I haven’t even asked my mom yet. I’ll tell her that I need to see this movie.

Steven: Okay, but I’m not saying no until she said so.

[In the kitchen, Lincoln has shown his mother the trailer on his phone.]

Rita: "Uh-uh, Lincoln, you are not seeing that movie. It’s too scary for you. He pulls around a cooler full of organs!"

Lincoln: [disappointed and groaning] "Mom!"

Steven: Well I tried to tell him that he can’t see it without your approval. However, I can’t believe you denied on that.

Rita: "You know how you get. You'll have nightmares. You'll think something's out to get you. You're just like your father."

[As she walks away, Lynn Sr. comes out from behind the sofa with a teddy bear.]

Lynn Sr. "That is a total exaggeration! On a completely different note, that trailer is never to be played in this house again." [walks away fidgeting in fear.]

Steven: Looks like your dad is improving quite a bit.

Lincoln: "Come on, Mom. I'm not a baby. I can handle it."

Rita: "'No' is my final answer."

''[Lincoln looks on disappointed. Steven tries to comfort him.]''

Steven: Don’t worry Lincoln. You’ll see this once you’ll be eighteen. I may or may not see it, bit it’s for the best of us.

''[The Royal Woods Cinema. Lincoln and Clyde are inside.]''

Clyde: "I'm fine not seeing The Harvester. It looks way too scary. And now, we get to see the new Blarney movie!"

[An usher is carrying around some Blarney hats.]

Usher: "Blarney beanies! Get your free Blarney beanies!"

Clyde: "Ooh, free Blarney hats? I'll take two!"

Lincoln: "One is fine."

[Clyde grabs and puts on a Blarney hat.]

Usher: "Get your free Blarney beanies!"

Lincoln: "It's not fair. My parents think I can't handle a scary movie."

[Rusty, Flat, and Papa all walk into the theater playing The Harvester.]

Lincoln: "Aw, man! Rusty gets to see The Harvester? That guy cried when a bird flew into the gym!" [gets an idea] "Maybe I should just go and not tell my parents. It's not like they'll find out."

Clyde: "You know, Blarney has a song about that, Lincoln. ♫Every time you lie / A leprechaun will cry.♫"

[Two little girls join in]

Clyde and Little Girls: "♫A fib to Mom and Dad / Well that's just twice as bad!♫"

Lincoln: "Yeah, that decides it. I'm going to The Harvester."

Clyde: "Come on, fellow Blarnadoons!"

''[He and the little girls go to the Blarney movie while Lincoln goes to The Harvester. The doors shut tight.]''

97 MINUTES LATER

''[All of the movie attendants except Lincoln come out talking about how much they enjoyed the movie. A horrified Lincoln slinks out of the theater and Clyde touches his shoulder.]''

Lincoln: [screaming with fear] "PLEASE DON'T TAKE MY GALLBLADDER!"

Clyde: "Guess I don't have to ask how the movie was."

Lincoln: "I had no idea a man in overalls could be that scary."

Clyde: "I'd say "I told you so", but Blarney has a song about that. ♫When someone is wrong, don't make a note / The truest friends should never ever gloat♫"

[The little girls join in again.]

Clyde and Little Girls: "♫Just cause you're the wiser-♫"

Lincoln: "CLYDE! I get it."

[Lincoln has just gotten home still shaken up from the movie.]

Clyde: "You gonna be alright?"

Lincoln: "My parents can not  find out that I went to see The Har...Har...Har...you know, that movie."

Clyde: "Good luck, buddy. If you need me, I'm here 24/7. But not on Channel 2. That's for Blarnadoons only. Later." [goes home]

[Lincoln steps in]

Rita: "Hey, Lincoln, how was the movie?"

Lincoln: [frantic] "What? I didn't see the movie!" [calmly] "Oh, you mean the Blarney movie. Which I did see."

Steven: Are you sure, you don’t seem a bit enthused about it. You didn’t go see that scary movie did you?

Lincoln: What?! No, I didn’t see that movie, thank goodness for your wise words.

Lynn Sr. "Oh, terrific! Hey, can you go get the ceramic pumpkins? We're putting up the Fall decorations."

Lincoln: "Sure, Dad. Where are they?"

Lynn Sr. "In the basement."

Lincoln: [struck with panic] "The basement?"

Lynn Sr.: "Yeah, in the far back corner by the light that burned out. You know, where Lana's snake went to die."

[Lincoln nervously gulps]

Steven: Can I help him too. Just to make sure he won’t get hurt.

Lynn Sr.: Sure, Steven. Good news, Lincoln, your friend is helping you out.

Lincoln: Phew!

[Lincoln and Steven opens the door to the basement.

Steven: Okay, Lincoln. Just relax. All we need is some light. Don’t worry, I’ll be right here. I’ll just stand here holding the door for you.

Lincoln: Thanks.

[Lincoln tries to turn the light on, but it doesn't shine.]

Lincoln: "Seriously?" [goes down the steps and hears a voice.]

Voice: "I will get you..."

Lincoln: [screams] "Who said that?" [notices he's stepping on a talking doll.]

Doll: [in a deep voice] "I will get you..." [in a happy tone] "...another cup of tea."

Lincoln: [sighs] "Get a grip, Lincoln. It's just a doll." [gets to the bottom, walks into a giant cobweb, falls into a few things that sets a Hockey stick to come at him, screams and gets out of the way as the doll's head comes off and rolls on the floor.] "THE HARVESTER!!!"

Steven: Lincoln! Are you okay?!

Lincoln: Yeah I’m fine.

Lynn Sr.: [from upstairs] "Lincoln, come back up! I just remembered the pumpkins aren't in the basement." [Lincoln rushes back upstairs] "They're in the attic."

Lincoln: [frightened] "The...attic?"

Lynn Sr.: "You know, that far, far back corner where there's no windows or light?"

''[Lincoln gulps again. They reach the attic.]''

Steven: Okay, I guess this is where they put the Halloween decorations. I got this flashlight, just to find them.

Lincoln: Thanks again.

[As he and Steven prepare to enter the attic, he notices one of his sisters.]

Lincoln: "Hey, Lola! Wanna go look for decorations in the attic with me?"

Lola: "No way. It's creepy up there."

Lincoln: "How about you, Lucy? You might find a bat."

Lucy: "I know we will, but none of them are vampires. So what's the point?"

[Lincoln reluctantly goes up to the attic and gets his shirt caught on a loose nail.]

Lincoln: "AH! THE HARVESTER'S GOT ME!" [gets his shirt off and gets hit by a bunch of whoopee cushions.] "AH! HE'S GOT MY SISTERS' COLONS AND THEY'RE STILL FARTING!"

Luan: [off-screen] "LINCOLN, STOP MESSING AROUND WITH MY WHOOPEE CUSHIONS! I MEAN, I KNOW THEY'RE A GAS!" [laughs]

[Steven comes in the attic to check on Lincoln.]

Steven: Lincoln! Are you alright?

Lincoln: I’m fine, it’s just a bunch of Luan’s whoopee cushions.

Steven: Did you find the pumpkins?

Lincoln: No! They’re not in here. Rita: [from downstairs] "Lincoln, I just remembered! Those pumpkins aren't in the attic! They're in the garage!"

[Lincoln gulps again and sneaks toward the garage.]

???: "I got hearts, kidneys, and ears!"

[A hoe rises up and digs deep into something.]

Lincoln: "THE HARVESTER!!!" [runs away screaming]

[It's actually just Mr. Grouse tending to his garden in the moonlight.]

Mr. Grouse: "Hearts of romaine, kidney beans and ears of corn. You never heard of a guy growing his own vegetables before?"

[Lincoln runs back inside.]

Steven: Are you okay, Lincoln? Did you find the pumpkins?

Lincoln: [panting] "They're not...in the...garage."

Lynn Sr.: "Oh, that's right. They're under the porch, in that dark claustrophobic crawl space where the walls feel like they're closing in on you the deeper you get." [Lincoln gulps once more.] "I'll just get them tomorrow. Sorry to make you run around, kiddo."

Lincoln: "Phew."

Steven: [stretching] Well, I’m getting kind of bushed. By the way, Mr. Loud. Is it okay that I should have a sleepover with my friends?

Lynn Sr.: Sure kid.

Steven: Thank you, now I’ll get in my jammies, and set up the sleepover here.

''[Later, everyone is going to bed and turning off the lights. Lincoln is making his way from the bathroom to his room.]''

Lincoln: [to the viewers] "Well, better get to bed before Mom and Dad think of anymore infested places to send me." [gets to his room and turns off the light.] "You know, I think I'm doing better. It's been a full 10 minutes since I've thought about the Har...Har...you know who I mean."

''[As soon as he's nice and safe in his bed with the door open and the hallway light on, the hallway light turns off. He gasps and turns it back on, but it turns off again. On and off. On and off. On and off. Lincoln turns them back on again.]''

Rita: [downstairs] "Lincoln! Enough! Lights out!" [turns off the light only for Lincoln to immediately turn them back on.] "LINCOLN!" [turns it off again]

''[Lincoln goes into Lana and Lola's room. He taps on Lola's sleeping mask and then stretches it and makes it snap on her eyes, making her growl and open her eyes.]''

Lincoln: "Hey, Lola, wanna watch some of your pageant videos?"

Lola: [delighted] "Ah!" [suspicious] "Okay, weird. Why would you want to do that?"

Lincoln: "Because I'm a huge fan of youth-oriented, glamor-based competitions."

Lola: "Oh, cut the crud, Lincoln. What is up?"

Lincoln: "Okay, I saw a scary movie today and I'm afraid to be alone."

Lola: "Well, just go sleep with Mom and Dad. That's what I always do."

Lincoln: "Uh...that's not an option."

Lola: "Well, neither is losing my beauty sleep. Goodnight to you, sir!" [goes back to sleep snoring.]

[Lana's bed is filled with different animals.]

Lincoln: "Hey, Lana-" [the animals wake up growling at him.] "Never mind." [leaves]

[He goes over to Lori and Leni's room where Lori is texting in her bed.]

Lincoln: "Hey, Lori."

Lori: "Whatever it is, I'm busy."

Lincoln: "Too busy to give girl advice?"

[Lori gasps and eagerly pulls Lincoln right under her covers.]

36 MINUTES LATER

Lincoln: "Okay, question 63: What does "going dutch" mean? And does it have anything to do with Dutch ovens?"

Lori: "Hmm..." [hears her phone beeping and gasps] "Session's over, Lincoln. I have to talk to Bobby. He started his new pizza delivery job tonight." [shoves Lincoln out of her covers.]

Bobby: "Check it, babe. I spelled your name with pepperonis."

[The pepperoni says "LORY" which is incorrect, and the pizza slides right out of the box.]

Bobby: "That's coming out of my paycheck."

[In the living room, Lincoln goes downstairs where Steven and his friends are having a sleepover watching some classic scary movies.]

Lincoln: [whispering] Psst! Steven.

Steven: Yeah. What’s wrong, can’t sleep. There’s room to sleep in.

Lincoln: Thanks, but I must tell you something?

Steven: Okay. What is it?

Lincoln: The truth is I saw a scary movie, and I’d lied to you about that.

Steven: [quietly] What?! You went to the Harvester movie without permission.

Lincoln: Yep.

Steven: I’m sorry Lincoln.

Lincoln: Please, don’t tell my parents about this, they must never know I went.

Steven: Okay, I’ll keep it a secret from you.

Lincoln: Thanks. By the way, what are you watching.

Steven: Me and my friends are watching some classic scary movies.

[Steven pulls out some DVDs that has titles including Halloween, Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Dawn of the Dead, and Scream.]

Lincoln: Cool.

Steven: Do you want to watch with us. I got some popcorn right here.

[Steven holds a bowl of popcorn.]

Lincoln: No thanks. I’ve seen quite enough.

Steven: Okay, but thank you.

Lincoln: Remember, do not tell my parents about The Harvester.

Steven: Okay, thank you.

[Lincoln comes back upstairs, and Steven and his friends continue watching scary movies.]

Steven: Whoa, man! This is the best part!

''[Lincoln now has a groggy Lynn shooting hoops with him in his room. Lynn shoots a hoop.]''

Lincoln: "That's 52-0, you." [notices Lynn is standing asleep] "Dang it."

[Now Lincoln is escorting Leni to the kitchen.]

Leni: "I don't get it. If it's morning, why is it still dark?" [yawns]

Lincoln: "It's, um...Daylight Savings Time."

Leni: [yawns] "Well, I love savings."

Lincoln: "So, what do you want for breakfast?" [looks in the fridge]

[Suddenly, he hears Leni going out the door with her backpack.]

Lincoln: "LENI!!!"

Leni: "I'm late for school. Bye, Linky."

Lincoln: "Leni, stop!" [immediately notices a cooler and a silhouette dragging him, making him believe it's you-know-who.] "IT'S HIM! WITH HIS COOLER FULL OF HARVESTED ORGANS!" [closes the door]

[It's just Mr. Grouse with his fishing gear.]

Mr. Grouse: "What's the matter, Loud? Never heard of night fishing?" [leaves]

[Lincoln retreats back to his room and picks up his radio.]

Lincoln: "Clyde! Come in! I really need somebody to talk to!"

[Clyde is sleep singing.]

Clyde: "♫Close your eyes, go to sleep / Blarney helps you count the sheep♫"

Lincoln: "What happened to 24/7? Who else could be awake right now?"

[A little while later, there's a knock at the door.]

Lincoln: [answers door] "Bobby! Congrats on the new gig! What do you say we celebrate by splitting this pie?"

Bobby: "I wish, bro. I still got six more houses to hit." [gives Lincoln his pizza and drops another on the floor.] "Make that five."

Steven: Hey guys, Pizza’s here!

[Steven comes up to Bobby and gives him the money for the pizza.]

Bobby: Wow! Thanks Steven.

Steven: No problem, keep the change.

Bobby: Aw! Sweet! Thank you.

Steven: You’re welcome, and congrats on that job.

[Bobby closes the door, Steven opens the pizza box and shows that it only has only pepperoni.]

Steven: Yes! They got my order right! Alright guys dig in.

[Back in his room, Lincoln's eyes are wide open from lack of sleep and he's now talking to his pillows that he drew faces on.]

Lincoln: [hysterical] "Thanks for staying up with me, guys. Hey, you cool with onions, Todd? No? How are you going to grow into a real man if you won't eat your onions, Todd? It'll put hair on your chest!" [whistles and hears a muffled banging.] "You guys hear that? Any volunteers to go check it out?" [the pillows obviously can't volunteer because they're pillows.] "Oh, sure. You'll eat my pizza, but when I need something, you sit there like a bunch of stuffed-" [hears the banging again and gasps.]

[He sneaks downstairs with the steps creaking, grabs a fireplace brush, and looks in the kitchen to find someone.]

???: "I'm gonna slice you right down the middle." [laughs evilly]

[Lincoln gasps and runs away and it turns out to be Lynn Sr. holding a snack.]

Lynn Sr.: "No. On second thought, maybe I'll just eat the whole thing."

[Lincoln, with nowhere else to turn, goes up to his room, blocks the door with his chair, and hides under the covers.]

Lincoln: [trembling with immense fear] "There's no such thing as the Har...Har...Har..." [keeps trembling "Har" all the way to sunrise.] "...Har...Har...Har..." [notices the sun is up and sighs with relief.] "Well, that was the worst night ever. But at least it's over."

[In the kitchen, Lynn Sr. is working on the ceramic pumpkins and Rita is checking the fridge.]

Rita: "Honey, have you seen the cake I baked for the school fundraiser?"

Lynn Sr.: [spits out coffee] "No, I didn't see your carrot cake."

Rita: [suspicious] "How did you know it was  carrot ?"

Lynn Sr.: "I...uh..." [sees his son] "Lincoln! There you are."

Rita: "Sweetie, your father and I have been talking and we think you're right. You're not a baby anymore, and it's time we stopped treating you like one."

Lynn Sr.: "Hey, look. If you say you're ready to see that horror movie, we believe ya."

Rita: "In fact, we bought four tickets. We're going with you."

''[Her husband spits out his coffee again and Lincoln looks on in shock as he pours the milk all over the floor and drops his glass upon hearing the news. Steven comes in looking a bit tired after last night's movie marathon.]''

Steven: [yawning] Man! What a night.

Lynn Sr.: Good morning, sir. How was that sleepover last night.

Steven: It was fun. [yawning] I’m still tired from watching those movies.

Rita: I told you not to stay up that late.

Steven: I know, but I’m getting use to it.

Rita: Okay, I got some news for you. We are seeing a horror movie tonight, would you like to join us.

Steven: Thank you, Mrs. Loud. I feel like I’m all bushed out on horror movies.

Rita: Are you sure, I told Lincoln he wants to see it.

Steven: Okay, sure. I’ll come too.

[Lincoln gulps after he hears the news that Steven’s coming.]

[The Royal Woods Cinema]

Rita: [looking at the posters for The Harvester.] "Ooh, look at these scary posters. This is gonna be so much fun."

Steven: Yeah, I really got to say that the lighting looks eerie and spooky.

Lynn Sr.: [hiding his fear] "Yeah. So much fun. I can't wait."

''[Lincoln sees the posters and runs in fear from them and bumps into a cardboard promo prop and runs out of the way as the usher puts it back up. Lincoln rushes to his parents.]''

Lincoln: [extremely afraid] "The Har...Har...Har..."

Rita: "Lincoln, what's the matter?"

Lincoln: "I can't do it! Mom, Dad, I'm sorry. I saw the movie yesterday, even though you told me not to. And you were right. I'm not ready. I was so terrified I didn't sleep all night. Please don't make me watch it again."

Steven: It’s true. He told me about it last night. He told me to keep it as a secret from you. But he and I just spilled the beans to you. Anyway, he’s sorry.

Rita: "Well, I'm not happy you saw the movie without our permission. But it sounds like you've been punished enough."

Lincoln: "I won't do it again, Mom. Now, can we please go see Blarney instead?"

Steven: Yeah, I’m still going to see The Harvester and I’ll never see that movie again, until it comes out on Blu-Ray or DVD.

Lincoln: Yeah, he’ll see it, if you let me see the Blarney movie with you guys.

Lynn Sr.: "Sure, son. But, honey, we'll have to come back because you know how much I love scary movies."

[Something rips and it causes Lynn Sr. to jump into his wife's arms.]

Lynn Sr.: "AAAHH! THE HARVESTER! DON'T TAKE MY PANCREAS!"

[It was just Mr. Grouse opening up one of his snacks.]

Steven: Relax, it’s just Mr. Grouse having some movie snacks.

Mr. Grouse: "What's the matter, Loud? You never seen a guy open a bag of chips?" [eats some chips and goes in to the theater playing The Harvester.]

Steven: Anyway. Have fun, Lincoln.

Lincoln: Thanks Steven. Go in there and get scared by the Harvester.

Steven: I will. See you after the credits.

''[Steven goes into the theater playing The Harvester. The Louds go into the theater playing Blarney's movie.]''

Louds and Blarney: "♫Every time you lie / A leprechaun will cry / A fib to Mom and Dad / Well that's just twice as bad!♫"