User blog:Thomperfan/Fool Me Twice (my version)

Well guys, here it is, my version of Fool Me Twice. Enjoy!

(It starts with me preparing to go to the Loud House for April Fool’s Day. Just then Sophia comes up to me.)

Sophia: Hi, Nolan! Whatcha Doing?

Me: I’m getting ready to go over to Lincoln’s house.

Sophia: What for?

Me: I told you, today is April Fool’s Day and Luan’s is going to play all these really dangerous pranks on us.

Sophia: Oh, can I come with you?

Me: No, Sophia, you have no idea what Luan’s pranks are capable of. If I took you guys with me, I’d be putting you in danger.

Sophia: Ohhhhhh, right.

Me: And Sophia, if I don’t make it out alive. Just promise me two things: One, that you’ll look after my stuff and make sure nothing bad happens to it, and Two, remember that I always loved you, mom and dad.

Sophia: I love you too, big brother.

(We hug, and I put on my green hoodie and put on a Cookie Monster mask.)

Sophia: Wait, what’s with the disguise?

Me: We’re meeting somewhere secret to discuss what to do about Luan, and we need to make sure Luan doesn’t follow us.

Sophia: Oh, OK.

(I give Sophia one more hug and head outside. A Bus stops in the middle of a street and Lincoln comes out, wearing a coat, a hat, and a glasses with a fake mustache, he then hides behind a dumpster, then in a tree, (which he accidentally falls out of) then he rides a scooter to a local highway.)

Lincoln: [Makes a bird call] Ca-ca! Ca-ca! [The Loud family sans Luan appears out of their hiding places in their diguises]

Lynn Sr.: [slowly and with an affected deep voice] What animal does Mary have?

Lincoln: [also with an affected voice] A lamb with the fleece as white as snow.

[The Loud Family, sans Lincoln, sighs in relief and they remove their disguises]

Lynn Sr.: Oh, good. It's really you, son. Are you sure Luan didn't follow you?

Lincoln: Definitely. I took 4 different buses. Plus, I've got Clyde doing some surveillance on her.

[At Sunset Canyon retirement home, Luan is entertaining the elders, with Clyde disguised an elder, monitoring Luan.]

Lori: Wait, where’s Nolan?

(Suddenly I come rushing in with my scooter, I stop when I reach the Loud Family and start panting.)

Me: (Still panting) Sorry, I’m late you guys, I had a few problems at home I need to take care of.

Rita: Never mind that, sweetie. We’re just glad you’re here.

Lynn: (suspiciously) Is he? How do we know this isn’t Luan in disguise?!

(She comes up to me and tries to pull of what she thinks is Luan wearing a costume. I start screaming in pain, and Lori and Lincoln try to pull us apart.)

Lincoln: Lynn, stop! It’s not Luan! It’s really Nolan!

Lynn: Oh. (to me) Sorry, buddy.

Me: That’s okay, Lynn. It was an honest mistake.

Lynn Sr.: OK, we’re all here. Now let's get down to business. April Fools day is tomorrow, and we still don't have a plan to stop Luan from pranking our butts off! So, who's got an idea?

Lori: Oh, Bobby said we could hide in the basement of the bodega, we just have to watch out for the rat traps...and the asbestos.

Rita: [unimpressed] You're really selling it, honey.

Lincoln: There's an island off the southern tip of Guam. You can only get to it by submarine.

Lynn: [Imitates a buzzing sound] We don't have passports, Stinkin'!

Lisa: Pending some grant money, I could build a ship that could take us to Europa, one of Jupiter's moons.

Lana: Or we can dig a system of tunnels under the house.

Leni: Why don't we just ask Luan to stop, but like, REALLY nicely?

(Everyone looks at Leni bewildered. I put my hand on her shoulder.)

Me: Leni, that is a really good idea, but I just don’t think it’ll work.

Leni: Aw.

Lynn Sr.: Ugh, maybe it's hopeless!

[A movie producer appears]

Producer: Excuse me, do you folks mind? We're trying to shoot a movie here.

Lola: Yeah guys! Outta the shot! [Lola poses] Okay, I'm ready for my close up!

Producer: Sorry, little girl, you need to get outta the shot, too. We're filming a dangerous stunt.

Lola: [Scoffs] Your loss!

Director: And...ACTION!

[A man in a red suit and matching motorcycle come crashing through a boarded window on a high speed chase, and leaps over an area full of police cars with an explosion following suite. He crash lands to the ground.]

Director: CUT!!!

[The man recovers from the crash, and removes his helmet. His appearance is similar to Lynn Sr.'s.]

Lynn: Man, that guy can really take a beating!

Leni: He looks just like Dad!

Lynn Sr.: Too bad I can't just hire him to take all of Luan's pranks for me.

[Everyone stares at Lynn Sr.]

Lynn Sr.: I wasn't being serious.

Lincoln: But Dad, maybe that's the perfect plan! We hire a bunch of stunt doubles to take all the hits for us, and we get off pain free.

[The family talks it over and agrees to the plan]

Leni: Wow, these doubles look just like us!

Me: Um, no, Leni. The doubles are over there. [Points towards the actual stunt doubles]

Leni: Oh, well, they're good too.

Lynn Sr.: So, uh, what's this gonna cost me?

[Lynn Sr.'s stunt double hands him the bill]

Lynn Sr.: [Gasps] Is this in dollars?!

Lincoln: I don't understand. Why is my double old?

Lynn Sr's stunt double: You're 11 and you have white hair. I did the best I could.

Lincoln's stunt double: I came out of retirement for this gig. These days, I mostly I just sit around reading in my underwear.

Lincoln: Never mind, he's perfect.

Lynn Sr.: Okay, famo. Now that everyone's got a double, it's time to teach them how to look and act just like us. We gotta work fast! Luan gets home at 5, and if she finds the house empty... [Looks at his double] Are you picking up on this? I talk with my hands. Big hand talker right here.

[Later, the Loud Family and I are teaching the doubles what to do and how to act like us]

Lana: Really get that mud up in your face. Don't be afraid to eat a little.

Lisa: Now in addition to English, I speak Mandarin, Latin, Swedish, and West Coast Rap.

Rita: So, this is the novel I'm working on. In case Luan asks you about it, you probably read the whole thing tonight.

Leni: Okay, so let's see the walk.

[Leni's stunt double attempts to imitate Leni's walking motion]

Leni: Almost, but you forgot part of it.

[Leni walks and crashes into the wall; Leni's double repeats this]

Me: OK, so this is Thomas, and that’s Edward, and there’s Henry, Gordon, James, Percy, Toby, Em-(I notice my double has fallen asleep) Aw, it wasn’t that boring.

Lincoln: First thing in the morning, I usually rush to the bathroom to beat the crowd.

Lincoln's double: Oh, same here! There're some pushy blue hairs at the senior center!

Lincoln: Then, before school, I'll sometimes stop for a Flipee. Watermelon Lime's my favorite.

Lincoln's double: It's my favorite flavor of gelatin!

Lynn Sr.: [Narrating] Okay gang, here's the plan, at Midnight, we sneak out of the house, and switch places with the doubles. They'll take it from there. [Rita and Lynn Sr. go to wake up the kids. When they go to wake up Luna, Lynn steps in to help.]

Lynn: I've got this! [Makes a paper airplane, and throws it at Luna.]

[The Louds and I sneak outside to switch places with the doubles]

Lynn Sr.: Good luck to you guys! Are you sure you're ready?

Lynn Sr.'s double: Don't worry about us, we're gonna be A-Okay.

[Morning. Inside the garage, the Louds and I peek out the garage, Lynn Sr. is making pancakes, and Lisa is looking over a giant monitor.]

Lisa: "Family and Nolan, gather 'round." [the family and I walk up to the monitor] "We can follow the action via the cameras I installed in everyone's room last year..." [the family look at Lisa with suspicion, and Lisa attempts to correct her blurt.] "Er... last night." [notices something] "Oh! We have movement in the twin's room!"

[Lisa hits a button labeled "CAM 8", and the monitor shows Lana and Lola's stunt doubles about to leave the bedroom.]

Lana and Lola: "Here it comes!"

[Lana and Lola's stunt doubles exit the room, but mysteriously, nothing happens.]

Lana: "Huh. I thought for sure Luan was going to nail them with a bucket of grease."

Lola: "Or a sock full of quarters!"

Lisa: "Old Lincoln is on the move... slowly."

[Lisa switches the monitor to showcase Lincoln's room. Lincoln's stunt double sits up, cracking his back.]

Lincoln: Oh, man, I can't watch. What's happening? Did he get injured?"

[Lincoln's stunt double walks out of the room, and still, nothing happens.]

Rita: "Well, he did hurt his back, but it seems unrelated."

Luna: [suspicious] "What's the dealio? Why aren't they getting pranked?"

Lucy: "Any why are they leaving the house?"

[On the monitor, each one of the stunt doubles is seen leaving the house. Realizing something, the family and I gasp, and quickly rush to the garage door, and peek out the windows, seeing the doubles head off in different directions.]

Lynn Sr.: [peeved] "What the heck?! I paid good money for them to get their butts pranked off!"

[Rita has a sudden realization.]

Rita: "Wait a minute, I get it. Luan's prank was to not prank us at all."

Lincoln: What do you mean, Mom?"

Rita: Ha! She knew we'd go crazy trying to protect ourselves, so she just let us chase our tails."

Lori: "Oh, you're right. She is good."

[The family laughs, realizing the trouble they went through.]

Me: (realizing something) Wait a minute, you guys, remember what happened last year? Luan said she wasn’t gonna prank us and then she did!

Lincoln: Oh yeah, she did do that, didn’t she?

Lisa: Well, as I recall, Luan said that to throw us off, so she would be able to prank us while we thought otherwise. If she actually wasn’t going to prank us I think not saying anything would imply that she doesn’t have anything in mind.

Me: Oh, you’re right. I guess Luan wasn’t gonna prank us.

Lynn Sr.: "Well, I may have burned through all our savings, but at least it's over!"

Luan: [off-screen] "Over? It's just getting started!" [we turn around, and scream in horror when we see Luan on the monitor, looking on devilishly.] "You know, family, I had a whole different plan in mind for today, but I'll save that for next year, because once I saw the amazing doubles you guys found, I was inspired to do something even better. So stay tuned, because the rest of this day is going to be doubly special!" [laughs evilly.] "Get it? You don't now, but you will."

[The monitor shuts off.]

Me: I knew it! Luan was planning something all along!

Lucy: [worried] "What is she talking about?"

Lynn: [panicking] Ah! Ah! Ah! We gotta stop her!" [she tries to open the door, but it won't budge.] "She welded the door shut!"

[Lincoln and Lana try the windows, but they too won't budge.]

Lana: "And the windows!"

Lori: "I'll try the garage door. Who's got the remote?"

Leni: [peeking out the garage window] "Oh, Luan does, she's outside!"

[The family and I rush to the garage door, and peek out the windows. We scream in horror upon seeing Luan with the garage remote. Luan, on her jester's chair, turns around, revealing to have Cliff on her lap.]

Luan: "Don't look at me, look at the monitors! I put cameras everywhere so you can enjoy the show. Ta-ta!"

Me: Yeah… I don’t think like where this is going.

Lynn Sr.: I don’t think any of us do, kid.

[As Luan rolls away, the family quickly rush to the monitor. They see Lincoln's double approaching a random house.]

Lincoln: "Ah! It's old Lincoln! What's he doing? Did he get lost?"

[Lincoln's double is seen grabbing a rock, and tossing it at one of the windows on the second floor. A silhouetted figure approaches the window, and opens it, revealing to be Mrs. Johnson.]

Lincoln's Double: "Mrs. Johnson, it's me, Lincoln. I can't get through another day of school without telling you, you are the center of my universe, and I love you!

[Mrs. Johnson looks on with worry.]

Lincoln: [humiliated] "Oh, no!"

[Lincoln collapses to the floor.]

Me: Uh, Lincoln? Lincoln?

[The monitor changes to something different.]

Lola: [worried] "Wait! That's my pageant studio!"

[Lola's double is revealed to be at Lola's pageant studio, standing in front of some of Lola's pageant rivals, and one of them is her biggest rival.]

Lola's Double: "Hi, Lindsey. I know I won Miss Junior Royal Woods this year, but the truth is, your neck is straighter, your hair holds curls better than mine, and your baton twirling puts mine to shame." [gives Lindsey the Miss Junior Royal Woods pageant crown Lola won.] "So here, this really belongs to you."

[As Lindsey smiles, Lola screams in utter horror, and collapses to the floor.]

Me: Lola? Lola!

Lisa: [horrified] "Oh, sweet irony! We handed Luan the perfect weapons to destroy us!"

[The monitor changes to something different.]

Leni: "Oh, no! My salon!"

[Leni's double is at the hair salon, sitting under a hardhat dryer. The dryer lifts up, revealing a perm.]

Leni's Double: "I love my new perm. I can't wait to show all my friends!"

[Leni screams in horror and starts crying]

Me: (trying to calm her down) Uh, don’t be sad, Leni. I think a perm looks really nice.

Leni: (through tears) You’re just saying that!!

Me: No, I really do think-

[As I continue consoling Leni, The monitor changes to show a rock concert being held by Sam and her friends. Luna's double suddenly appears on the stage.]

Luna's Double: "Dudes, stop!" [the band members stop playing] "I think I want to take this thing in a new direction."

[Luna's double dons a feathered fedora, pulls out an accordion, and begins playing polka music.]

Luna: "Bogus! That's not even good polka!"

Me: I don’t know, I kinda like it.

Luna: (to me) You dude, have no taste in music.

[The monitor changes to a park. Lana's double is seen holding a squirming worm in front of Lana's friends.]

Lana's Double: [grossed out] "Eww, eww, eww! A worm!" [runs off]

Lana: [mad] "I wouldn't run from it, I'd eat it!" (take some worms she has in her pocket and starts eating them) See?! I’m eating them right now! I’m not afraid!

The monitor changes to something different.]

Lynn: "Uh, why is my double playing against that dweeb? It's not gonna be much of a competition."

[The monitor shows Lynn's double playing a game of tetherball against Zach. Zach smacks the ball, and Lynn's double flinches in fear as the ball wraps around the pole, giving Zach the victory.]

Lynn: [distraught] "No! My 300 game winning streak!" (Panicking) Gotta get my edge back! Uh… (to me) I can breathe faster than you! (Starts breathing really heavily; to Lisa) I can look at the screen longer than you! (Looks at the monitor very intensely; to an unconscious Lola) I can be unconscious longer than you. (She falls to the ground and pretends to be unconscious)

Rita: "What is she doing at my publisher's?"

[Rita's double is seen at the publisher's building with Rita's novel.]

Rita's Double: "I know I said I needed another month to work on my novel, but I decided it's actually ready."

Rita: [horrified] "No! The ending is wrong! I wanted it all to be a dream!"

[As Rita collapses to the floor, the monitor changes to show Lisa's double at the podium at a scientific presentation.]

Lisa's Double: "Colleagues, I believe that my latest presentation will knock your proverbial socks off." [Lisa's double pulls a tarp off a board, revealing a picture of a cat. The attendees gasp in surprise.] "This is a kitty. He says 'meow'."

[Lisa, shocked to see her double present something so mundane, falls back, and collapses to the floor. The monitor now shows Lucy's double standing in front of Lucy's friends.]

Lucy's Double: "The eyes are the windows to the soul..." [grabbing the hair that conceals her eyes] "...and it's time I bare mine to you."

Me: (Scream and cover my eyes) NO! NO, I DO NOT WANT TO SEE THOSE!!

Lucy: "Gasp. Those were never meant to be seen."

[Lucy collapses to the floor, and the monitor changes to a familiar place.]

Lynn Sr.: "Banger's & Mosh, the British eatery and rock venue?" [worried] "Oh, what's he doing there?"

[Lynn Sr.'s double is seen at the restaurant with a couple of Lynn Sr.'s friends.]

Quizmaster: "Welcome to the "Are You a True Englishman" trivia challenge. First question: In what city is the Tower of London?"

[Lynn Sr.'s double hits his buzzer.]

Lynn Sr.'s Double: "Oh, I got this one! Rome!"

[Lynn Sr.'s friends facepalm at their "friend" getting a question with a rhetorical answer wrong, and Lynn Sr., horrified for the same reason, collapses to the floor. The monitor changes to show Lori's double going on a date with Bobby at Giovanni Changs Italian Chinese Bistro.]

Lori's Double: "Thanks for coming all the way here to meet me, Boo Boo Bear. I just really missed you." [she suddenly lets one loose.] "Oh, that was my shoe." [she lets another one loose] "That was my other shoe." [she lets a third one loose, causing Bobby to cover his nose.] "I have some extra shoes in my bag."

[Lori, horrified to see her double humiliate her in front of her boyfriend, screams in terror, and collapses to the floor.]

Me: (to Lori) Oh, what are you so upset about? It’s not like you do that all the time.

Lori: (to me) Shut up!

Me: (noticing something) Wait what’s my double doing at my house?! He’d better not hurt my parents or Sophia!

Rita: Um, I think he’s gonna hurt something else.

(The monitor is changed to show my double standing on top of the staircase with a sculpture of me and Sophia together, and Sophia not to far behind my double looking concerned.)

Sophia: Nolan, be careful!

My Double: Oh, what’s this? A sculpture!

Me: (gasps) That’s not just any sculpture! It’s the sculpture me and Sophia worked on when we were younger! We’ve always kept it in our bathroom closet so it would stay safe!

My Double: I think it looks really nice- Ooops!

(My double drops the sculpture and it tumbles down the stairs and breaks into pieces.)

Me and Sophia: (At the same time) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! (Start crying)

Sophia: (to my double; still crying) Nolan, how could you?!

My Double: Oh, silly me. I’m just clumsy. (chuckles)

Me: (still in tears) That was the first thing the two of us ever made together. Why would Luan be so mean?!

(I continue crying as Leni, Lincoln, and Rita console me. Later the 12 of us are sitting on the floor moping at our humiliation. Lana suddenly pops out of a hole.)

Lana: "Good news, guys. I dug us out."

Lola: [distraught] "How is that good? It's not like we can leave. We can't show our faces anywhere in Royal Woods ever again!!"

Lynn Sr.: "Well, guys, it's clear what we have to do."

Me: And what’s that?

[Luan returns home in her unicycle and helmet to see Rita putting "This House for Sale" sign, with the rest of family with boxes]

Luan: Uh, Mom, what's going here?

Rita: Obviously, we're moving, honey. You should go pack your things.

Luan: What? Why?

Lynn Sr: Well, it's not like we can stay. You pretty much ruined our lives here.

Me: (with a box of my stuff) And I’m coming too, since my family’s not gonna want a sculpture-wrecking kid in their house.

Luan: Okay, guys. Nice try. You really had me there for a moment.

[A moving truck backs up in the driveway]

Mover: Is this the La-oods residence?

[Luan see her siblings putting their boxes inside the truck and feels guilty for what she did]

Luan: You guys, wait! I'm sorry for the pranking! Please, we can't move.

Luna: It's too late to turn back now.

Luan: No it isn't! I'll call everyone I embarrassed you guys in front of. I can explain everything!

Lincoln: It's not gonna make a difference.

Me: Yeah, what’s done is done.

Lynn Sr: So we'll see you in the Florida Panhandle Tuesday Morning.

Luan: [crying, remorseful] No! We can't leave! Royal Woods is our home! I'm so sorry! I'll never prank you again!

Family and I: APRIL FOOLS!!!

Luan: [Happy] I really gotta hand it to you guys. You're really starting to the get the hang of this. But you might want to stop that truck.

[Moving truck departs]

Lincoln: Actually, most of those boxes were empty. Except the ones filled with your stuff. So you might want to stop that truck.

Luan: [Horrified, runs after the moving truck] No! Come back!

(The scene ires out and then I pop up.)

Me: Hey, guys! Well, that was an interesting episode. It definitely got, tear-jerking near the end. B-but don’t worry! We did talk to our friends and family and sorted everything out. Me and Sophia even re-built our first sculpture and put it somewhere even safer. Not telling you where, though. As for the doubles, we still don’t know what happened to them. After they humiliated us, they mysteriously disappeared and we haven’t heard from them since. But Mr. Lynn says if he does find them, he’s gonna sue them for a lot of money, as soon as he can find a lawyer. But on the big question: Does this mean Luan is really done pranking us every single April Fool’s Day? Well… seeing as how sad she was and how sincere she sounded when she broke down, I’d say we have a good chance, but with Luan you just never know. Anyway, thanks for watching/reading, and we’ll see you in the next episode. Bye!

(I jump off screen)

THE END

Trivia

 * I was actually going to have my double tell my family, I didn't love them and that I was moving in with the LKs, but I figured that would be a little too dramatic and serious, so I decided to go with breaking something me and my sister worked on.