User blog comment:TheSims2Player/The loud house fan fiction : The Loud Phantom/@comment-31563773-20170801212605

Well, since is your first, I'm going to let you have a first taste at reviews: by being as blunt and brutally honest as possible.

First off, I didn't read any of it because it's a gaint wall of text. I understand it has character dialog in the script format, but before you start writing, you should look at how other fics are set up so you have a grasp of how fics are built.

Second, and most important, you need to learn proper spacing. Each time a character speaks, it should have its own line, not jumbled together with another character's. Same for descibing an event. And since this is just one big paragraph, it's very easy to get lost. So can you please go back and edit this so everyone can understand what you just typed?