Shop Girl/Script

The following is a transcript for the episode "Shop Girl".

Script
[The episode begins early morning at the Loud House, the siblings, except Leni, are in their pajamas eating cereal and watching TV] Leni: [Offscreen] "Hey guys, anyone seen my bus pass?" Lori: "Did you check your purse?" Leni: "Thanks, I got it, did someone take the credit card?" Lola: "Check your purse." Leni: "Oh, right, wait my shopping list."

Lisa: “The purse, woman!”

Leni: [Walking in] "Culottes, jeans, pom-pom sweater."

Lincoln: "Going shopping, Leni?" Leni: "Not just shopping, Reiningers is having a huge, two day, twenty-five percent off, blowout sale, and I made up a dream shopping list for it. Yay, new wardrobe!" [Leaves, as her siblings bid her ado] "Shoot, where did I put my purse?" Leni's siblings: "Check your arms." [They return to their breakfast, and a few hours later, they are in their regular clothes eating lunch] Leni: [Offscreen] "I'm back." [The siblings look, and see that their sister has been beaten up as she is shown with her messed up dress, a cracked lense on her sunglasses, and is missing her sandal] Lana: "Are you okay, Leni? Did you wrestle a bear?" Lynn: "Where's your stuff?"

Leni: "I didn't get any of it."

Lori: "What?! Why?"

Leni: "Well, you know how shoppers can be. Sometimes, they can be a little grabby and pushy. And clawy and shovey."

Lola: "Uh, wait, did you let a bunch of greedy bargain hunters take your stuff?!"

Leni: "I don't mind. I'll just make new clothes with my old ones. Yay!" [goes upstairs]

Lori: [Takes out the remote] "Poor Leni. This always happens. She's too nice for her own good." [Lola takes the remote from Lori and starts channel surfing] Lisa: "It's true, her submissive nature makes her easy prey." [Lucy takes the remote from Lola] "Much like the baby wildebeest of the serengeti." Lana: "She needs to learn how to be a little tougher." Lola: "A little meaner." [Gets into a fist fight with Lucy over the remote] Lynn: [Joining the fight] "More aggressive." Lola: [To Lucy] "I WANT THE REMOTE!" [The other sisters, except Lily, join the fight] Lori: "Give me that remote back!" Lincoln: [Who also wasn't in the fight, but manages to grab the remote anyway and use it] "More like us." [Leni is shown sewing something in her room while her siblings come in] "Leni, how would you like to go back to that sale tomorrow, and get everything you wanted?"

Leni: "That's okay. I'm fine. [Shows what she's sewing] Look! I turned this nightgown into jeans! [realizes] Oh, wait. Now I don't have a nightgown. [Gets some other jeans] "Ooooh, I can make one out of these other jeans!"

[The siblings shake their heads]

Luan: "Leni, [sits Leni down] You need to learn to stand up for yourself."

Lana: 'Yeah, you don't wanna be wilted-beets in the spaghetti!"

Lisa: "Meh, close enough."

Lori: "But don't worry, we're to teach you how to become a more assertive, decisive person!"

Leni: "Well, okay. If you guys want. I'm just happy when you're happy."

Lincoln: [facepalms; sighs] "We have a lot of work to do."

[Later, outside the bathroom] Lincoln: "Tomorrow, you're going back to that mall as a new Leni. And the new Leni, doesn't let people cut ahead of her in line." [Leni nods, and Lincoln calls out to everyone] "Ten, hut." [The other sisters are lined up along the wall, Luan approaches Leni] Luan: "Now, you're number one in the bathroom line. Don't let anyone make you number two. [Laughs] Get it?"

Leni: I don't, but don't worry! No one's gonna cut!

Lynn: [acting; groans] "I'm feeling the surprise part of Dad's taco surprise! Oh, you gotta let me cut, Leni!"

Leni: "Oh, you poor thing! Go right ahead!"

[The other siblings groan]

Lola: "Alright. Step aside and watch a pro do it. Lori, your assistance."

Lori: [acting] "Ahem, I'm in a hurry, Lola! Let me cut!"

[Lola growls; Lori tries to cut, but Lola starts attacking her]

Lori: "How are you so freakishly strong?!"

Lola: [pinning Lori down] "I HOPE YOU LIKE THE TASTE OF FLOOR!!!!"

Leni: [taking notes] "Tackle, Pin, Catchphrase. Got it!"

[Out in the backyard, the kids, minus Leni and Luna, pile some clothes on a table] Luna: "Second lesson, the new Leni isn't afraid to go after what she wants," [pointing to the table] "there's some rockin' threads on that clearance table, but you got major peeps blockin' your way. What are you gonna do, dude?" Leni: [With determination] "I'm gonna get those threads!" [Marches up to the table with a serious look on her face, and politely taps Lynn on the shoulder] "So sorry, would you mind moving?" [Tries to find an opening] "No? I can wait until your ready." [Walks away, as her siblings at the table sigh] Luna: ''[Pushes Leni back. And to Lynn]'' "Yo, LJ, show her how it's done." Lynn: "With pleasure." [Runs off, and returns wearing her football helmet] "Hut, hut," [paints black lines on her face] "take a hike!" [Rampages her siblings like football, spins a sweater over her head to celebrate, and starts doing a victory dance on it, much to Lori's chargin] Lori: "Hey! Bobby gave me that sweater!" [Shoots Lynn a dirty look] Leni: [Taking notes] "Run, block, do a dance."

[Afterwards, they are in the kitchen] Lucy: "Third lesson, protecting your property." [Hands Leni a phone charger, which Leni takes] "The new Leni doesn't let greedy shoppers steal her stuff." Lana: "That phone charger is the only working one in the house, your goal is to hold onto it, no matter what." Leni: [Still missing the point of these training sessions, gets up] "Oh, it's okay," [gives Lana the charger] "I can use the land line." Leni's siblings: [Annoyed] "Leni, no" [put her back in the chair] Lana: "Put yourself first!" Lori: [Takes the charger, sighs, and goes to the other side of the kitchen] "I'll show you how it's done. I've been protecting my junk from you guys for seventeen years," [wraps the charger around her under arm] "the key is to use a good, firm, armpit grip." [To her other siblings] "Alright, come at me." [They attack her while Leni remains seated] Leni: [Taking notes] "Armpit tuck, fall on floor, protect vital organs." [Leaves without saying anything else] Lori: [Not realizing that Leni has already left] "Got it yet Leni?! Ow! Leni!?

[The next day, Leni and her siblings are waiting in the line at Reiningers]

Leni: "Thank you guys for all of your help. I'm so excited about the new Leni! Just one question: Where did the old Leni go?"

[Just then, some guy shoves in front of Leni like she's not even there, her siblings are not happy] Luna: "Hey dude! Bogus!" Leni: [Clenching her fists, and making a face] "I got this creep." [Attacks him the same way Lola did to Lori the day before, pins him to the ground] "I hope you like the taste of flan!" [Turns to her astonished siblings] "Was it 'flan' or 'floor'? I heard flan.

Leni: "Take a hike!" [Leni shoves a bunch of women out of her way to reach the swimsuits] Lynn: "All day long, baby!"