Thread:TheMaximumMatt/@comment-30953185-20180407173640/@comment-32807753-20180407224809

Sorry. I was having lunch. Hope I didn't cause much trouble.

LUAN: I know who still got money. - Luan said

Luan: This cannot end well...

(Lincoln is counting his money and he's looking at something online) LINCOLN: I can't wait to show this to my sisters. - Lincoln said (Heavy footsteps occur and shadows approach the door, shocking Lincoln) LINCOLN: (shocked) Uh oh. - Lincoln said shocked

Lincoln: Yeah... I think they get that I'm shocked. No need to say it twice.

Lisa: Also, what is with this style of dialogue? It seems like its trying to combine both a narrative and script style, which don't mix well at all.

Lincoln: Yeah. It makes it seem like I'm literally saying "said Lincoln, shocked" out loud.

(He quickly stuffed his money in his pocket, place his laptop on his desk, and pull out a comic book to read; Lynn kicked down his door so hard, it was removed from its hinges)

Lynn: Dang. I've got strong quads.

LINCOLN: (nervously) Oh, hey girls. - Lincoln said - What's up? LORI: Hey, bro you got any money leftover? - Lori said, glaring at him LINCOLN: Nope, no money at all. - Lincoln said - I spend it all. LUNA: Don't play stupid, bro. - Luna protest - We know you still got money leftover. LINCOLN: You guys were vicious to me yesterday, why you guys think you deserve it? - Lincoln said

Lincoln: Okay... I'm confused. Just a moment ago I was excited about showing my sisters something, and I'm assuming that I'm buying something for them out of kindness judging by this scene, but then I get all angry at them, saying they don't deserve anything? Why am I keeping what I'm buying a secret anyway? Wouldn't it clear things up if I just tell them what I was going to do with the money from there?

Lisa: You have to start a conflict somehow...

LOLA: Because we was looking for it! - Lola yells

Lisa: (breathes in)

Lori: Zip it!

[Lisa kindly does so]