Homespun/Script

[Episode begins at the Loud House, a crash is heard] Lori: "AAH! DANG IT!" [In the kitchen, Lincoln is taking out the trash when he hears Lori scream] Lincoln: [to the viewers] "Sounds like someone got trapped in the bathroom again." ''[Inside the bathroom, Lori, wearing a bathrobe and towel on her head, is holding the doorknob to the bathroom door, which just broke off. She growls at this]'' Lori: "Somebody let me out! Bobby's coming over to study, and I only have three hours to get ready!" ''[Lori struggles to open the bathroom door, when suddenly, she slips. She grabs hold of the shower curtain, but it rips off. The pole holding the curtain bonks Lori on the head. Lori growls even louder at this string of events]'' "THIS HOUSE IS LITERALLY FALLING APART!!!" Lincoln: [to the viewers] "Lori's right. With 11 kids, four pets... and two parents who insist on fixing everything themselves, our house is a bit of a, how do I say this nicely, disaster."

[Flashback to Lana and Lola brushing their teeth]​ Lincoln: [voice-over] "You've got the faulty water pressure."​ ''[Lana puts her mouth under the faucet, an turns the water pressure on, but nothing comes out. Lola is ticked off at Lana's uncouth method or rinsing her mouth]'' Lana: [leaving the bathroom] "Eh. I'll go borrow some water from Charles' bowl." Lola: "Try to have a little digni-" ''[As Lola was talking, the increased water pressure from the pipes breaks loose, spewing water onto Lola, flinging her into the trash can. Flashback to Luna arriving home late at night with her music equipment]'' Lincoln:  "And the creaky floorboards." ''[As Luna enters the house, she gives a "hang loose" hand gesture and tiptoes over to the staircase. She steps on the first step, making a loud creaking sound. This alerts Lynn Sr., scaring Luna]'' Lynn Sr: "Lori? Leni? Luan?" Lincoln: "Don't forget about the rotting wood."​ ''[Luna tries to grab hold of the handrail, but the entire staircase breaks apart. As Luna stands back up, Lynn Sr. flashes a light at her]'' Lynn Sr.: "Luna!" [Flashback to Lincoln adding the finishing touches to a model pirate ship] '''Lincoln: "Then there's the clunky furnace." '[Lincoln has just added the captain on the ship]'' "Well, Captain. After 13 weeks of careful construction, your ship is finally ready." ''[As Lincoln looks on with pride, the furnace begins rattling. As Lincoln holds his model ship in fear, the furnace spews out some soot, covering Lincoln with it and damaging his model ship. Flashback to Lynn Sr. adjusting the TV antenna on a windy day]'' Lincoln: "And the crummy TV signal." ''[Inside the house, the kids are complaining that the TV is fuzzy again. Rita is outside putting pillows on a trampoline just in case is Lynn Sr. falls off. A sheet of foil lands on Lynn Sr.'s face, blinding him. His vest gets caught on the TV antenna, causing him to get tangled in the antenna] '' Lynn Sr.: [panic-stricken] "Something's got me!" [Inside the house, the TV signal is back, as a "Peanuts"-esque show appears on the screen] Luan: Wait! Wait! That's perfect! [As the Loud kids cheer at the signal being back, Lynn Sr. falls off the roof, along with the TV antenna, causing the signal to be lost again] Loud kids: "Aww." [Flashback to a series of moments where doorknobs and door handles broke off] Lincoln: "And the doorknob situation." Lisa: [doorknob] "Dang it." Leni: [fridge door handle] "Dang it." Lynn: [doorknob] "Dang it." Lucy: [attic cord] "Dang it." Lori: [doorknob] "Dang it." Luna: [flusher handle] "Dang it." Lincoln: [doorknob] "Dang it." [End flashback]