Thread:MrTyeDye/@comment-30953185-20180610061643/@comment-32202721-20180610171307

I see.

My suggestion would be to spend more time building suspense. You have Thomas/Timothy go all demonic before the sense of dread really kicks in for the reader. Also, the nightmare as a whole is kind of esoteric; the first time Timothy's name was brought up, my initial reaction was, "Wait, who?"