Thread:Neflhelm/@comment-26253276-20170829223520

I have overwhelming amounts of suggestions for your fanfiction that gained ZERO traction.

1. Lincoln's sisters  NEVER  apologized, nor did his classmates.

2. Lincoln took the joke too lightly.

3. The story is dry of comedy and has a poor ending.

Take my first story, Geometry Dash Adventure. In it, Luna may have caused chaos against her siblings, but she still apologized. Because of Luna's heavy regrets, her siblings forgave her, putting it all in the past. And some things are elements of comedy in the story:


 * Luna nearly lands on Lincoln. He dives out of the way and into another hazard.


 * Lincoln lands on Luna after respawning.


 * Lynn slams against a portal blindly and falls backward.


 * "Too late."


 * Traps are rigged to help Lincoln and Lynn fight Luna.

Take it from me: I try to have good amounts of comedy in my story and balance it out with the audience's preference. I NEVER attempt to use dry comedy.

Neither of our stories gained much ground, but that is because your story had poor quality while mine was not noticed much.

I strongly advise you read my fanfiction (Geometry Dash Adventure) to get some ideas to rework the story. And when you rework the story, ENSURE YOU REWORK THE STORY ITSELF BY USING THE EDIT BUTTON. 