User blog:PRStorm/Loud Sins: Sound of Silence (feat. Powerpuff-Pony)

Everything Wrong With Featuring Special Guest Powerpuff-Pony In 3300 Words or Less

Spoilers! (duh)
[Title]Leave the song references to Luna, segment title. '''(1)

[Title card]'''Title card contains cacophonous noises rather than something pleasant like the sounds Lincoln hears through his earplugs in the actual episode. - PPP(2)

Lincoln: [removes his clothes] "Shoes, off! Shirt, removed! Pants, begone!" After the whole Chris Savino debacle, this takes on a whole new meaning that I don't even want to think about. It would make me feel dirty. - PPP '''(3)

Lincoln:''' "It's new comic Wednesday!" Free Comic Book Day exists in the Loud House universe, and Lincoln was somehow lucky enough to get his hands on a copy of Muscle Fish before they ran out. Maybe the Ace Savvy comics had all run out, and the best he could do is choose his second-favorite comic series that we never see him express his love for in the show, outside of background stuff and small details. '''(4)

Lincoln:''' "There's no better way to read comics than in my undies!" Oh, f*ck you, Savino, you're not even being subtle anymore. (5)

[Muscle Fish comic signature] David King, eh? The guy who made that gross-looking comic from There Will Be Chaos? His work doesn't even look good as regular-sized panels, don't show it in an extreme close-up! '''(6)

Lincoln:''' "Optimal reading attire?" [snaps underwear] "Check." [puts on safety gloves] "Comic protection? Check!" Lincoln calls his underwear the optimal reading attire, despite putting on safety gloves immediately after doing so. '''(7)

[Lucy pops up on Lincoln's bed] Lucy:' "I have to tell you --" [Lincoln screams]'' "...about this dream I had last night." Lincoln was looking right at where Lucy is here just a second ago! How did he not see her there? Or did Lucy somehow climb through that small window or something? (8) Also, Lincoln still isn't used to this. '''(9)

[Under the table] Lincoln:''' "Peace and quiet. Check. Again." [Izzy climbs on Lincoln's comic] Lincoln didn't check to see if there was anything under the table with him before he declared peace and quiet under the table. '''(10)

Lana:''' "Izzy, where are you?" [Lincoln screams] Lincoln, and 11-year-old boy, is afraid of what his six-year-old sister has no problem handling at all. (11)Also, Lincoln is terrified of adorable lizards. '''- PPP (12)'''

Lana: "I see you met my new lizard, Izzy. Wanna pet him?" [Lincoln glares at Lana] Refusing anything from the most adorable tomboy in all of media. (13)

[Luna's guitar playing causes Lincoln to fall from the vents and onto a beanbag] Luna is so motherly a sister, that she knows to set up a beanbag in case any of her siblings fall from the vents. (14)

[Lincoln reads Muscle Fish in a garbage can] Garbage can reading. (15) '''[Luan Finds Lincoln in the trash can] Luan: "Oh hey, Lincoln! Luan doesn't question why her only brother is down in the dumps. Yes, my inner Luan shall never be satisfied.    - PPP(16)

Luan:' "I would talk trash, but I refuse''!" [laughs]Luan. Nobody calls garbage 'refuse'. You're literally making up stuff to make puns about. (17)

[Lincoln is out of the garbage] Lincoln has a bottle on his leg that reads 'Zoso', but doesn't have any trash on him that has three almond shapes inside a circle, a triple-circle Venn Diagram, or a feather inside a circle. (18)Also, how the heck did Lincoln get his foot in that 2-liter bottle? Unless his bones are made out of rubber, there is no possible way for anyone, even a kid his size, to do that. - PPP'''(19)

Lincoln:''' "When you've got ten sisters, it's almost impossible to find a moment's peace." TV Announcer: "Do you find it almost impossible to get a moment's peace?" Show's universe is so built on repeating quotes, that even its in-universe commercials are built on repeating quotes. (20)

TV Announcer: "Then you need the Noise-B-Gone 2000 ear buds!" When a cartoon comes out 16 years after the year 2000, and it's still using the number 2000 in the names of its state-of-the-art technology, at what point does it start using the next multiple of a thousand? Like, seriously, this is on the same level as ridiculously outdated as the name "20th Century Fox"! (21) TV Announcer: "With twelve different soothing sounds..." Really? Only twelve? Do these headphones not have Bluetooth capability so Lincoln can play more sounds from his phone if he wants to? '''(22)

TV Announcer: '''"Only $19.95, call now." Um, no. I don't care how advanced those ear plugs are. There is no way those tiny things are worth $19.95. It's about as stupid as having a small Gravity Falls Waddles plushie that's as big as my palm, and yet it costs about $10. Get the value right! '''- PPP (23)''' Also, the graphic on the television says $19.99. Is this a misinformed announcer or a continuity mistake? (24)Also also, I've seen enough infomercials to know that shipping and handling is involved. And you must be 18 years old or older to order. And Lincoln is only 11. Infomercial doesn't know how to infomercial! '''(25)

[TV flashes 'call now' in Dunkin Donuts font]'''Since when is Dunkin Donuts doing infomercials?! '''(26)

[Lincoln smashes piggy bank with shoe]'''Lincoln smashes his piggy bank with his shoe, even though all he should really need to do is throw it hard against the ground. '''(27)

[Lincoln shushes his birthday card]'''Lincoln shushes his birthday card, even though it's the day, and there's no one asleep to be awoken by its jingle. '''(28)

[Lincoln finds money in vents]'''Lucy didn't already find this money from her hanging out in the vents. '''(29)

[Lincoln is on the phone, with a large stash of money next to him]'''Whoa, Lincoln, the earbuds only cost twenty dollars! Not that entire Scrooge McDuck pile! '''(30)

[Delivery drone arrives]''' Michael Rubiner must've wrote this segment thinking delivery drones were gonna be commonplace technology by the time the segment aired. But since they're not, this appearance of a delivery drone only feels like a tacky product placement for Amazon. (31)

Lincoln: [throws money stash at drone] "Take my money!" And keep my hundreds of dollars worth of change! (32)

[Explosion from Lisa's room as Lincoln activates the earbuds]You know, with all the explosions that come from Lisa's experiments, you have to wonder why she hasn't burned the house down yet. '''(33)

[Luna plays music, Leni walks out of room, repeat]'''Leni is so jealous of Luna being such a popular character, she can't even stand to be in the same room as her. (34) Also, I know these are noise-cancelling earbuds, but are you sure Luna's guitar can't be heard over those things? Electric guitars are pretty loud! (35) '''[Lincoln continues to use Noise-B-Gone... on both Lana and Lola]''' Lincoln ignores both Lola and Lana during this sequence. My inner Lola and Lana fanboy demands that this be counted as a sin. - PPP'''(36)

[Lincoln boops Lana on the nose]'''That's right, Lincoln. Lana IS the cutest thing ever. And acknowledgement of this fact by booping her on the nose awards you a negative sin. (35)

'''[Lincoln takes out earbuds... no background noise] Lincoln:''' "Noise-B-Gone, you! Are! Awesome!" [And the noise is back when Lincoln jumps off his bed] The ruckus outside of Lincoln's closet bedroom went silent just for him to deliver that one line. '''(36)

Lincoln:' "So why stop at comics? Let the quiet times roll!''" Leave the musical references to Luna, Lincoln. '''(37)

[Luan walks by]''' Lincoln: "Funny. Funny stuff." Lincoln just assumes that Luan told a joke as she walks by him, because Lincoln thinks all comedians speak only in jokes. '''(38)

[Lynn leans over Lincoln as he plays a video game]'''How does Lynn not see Lincoln's earbuds from this close up to him? Does she not know earbuds when she sees them? (39) '''[Lincoln is going to bed] Lincoln:' "Thanks for a silent day, guys. You're my new best buds''." Leave the puns to Luan, Lincoln. '''(40)

[Lola swings Lincoln's closet bedroom door open]'''And so begins the fandom considering Lola a 'mean sister'. '''(41)

Lola:''' "You didn't forget, did you?" Lincoln: "Of course I didn't forget, Lola." Lola: "Good. Because you wouldn't want to make me MAD!!!" You gotta love how Lola can swing from a cute little girl to a devious little tyrant in the span of just a split second. Like every bratty little kid her age. Another sin removed for this excellent characterization! (40) [Lynn pops up in Lincoln's doorway] Because the segment wants to enforce the idea that Lynn is a mean sister, Lynn is the first to drag Lincoln into something he claims to have promised her. '''(41)

[Lynn kickboxes Lincoln]'Lynn, this isn't Street Fighter or Mortal Kombat''. Real fighters don't move back and forth when they're standing. Get a fighting teacher other than your SNES fighting games. (42)

Lincoln: "Do you know where... uh... Lola went today?" A six-year-old going places by themselves. '''(43)

Lynn:''' "You know what happens when you make Lola mad! Did I ever tell you about the pudding incident?" Pudding. Serial rapist Bill Cosby was the spokesperson for Jell-O pudding from 1974 to 1999. The signs of Savino's creepiness were there all along! '''(44)

[In the flashback, Lynn finds her soccer ball deflated in the bed with her and screams]'''Oh, come on, Lynn. It's not like it's a severed horse head. Now THAT would be terrifying. - PPP(45)Also, segment thinks The Godfather is a popular movie with the show's target demographic. (46) Also also, this plastic knife is somehow strong enough to poke through Lynn's leather soccer ball. '''(47)

Lynn:''' "Stay focused." [kicks Lincoln into a soccer goal] "Goal!" Okay, you're not even practicing kickboxing anymore. You're practicing soccer. And since we find out later that these stories the sisters are telling are made-up, I can only assume Lynn made up this story involving her soccer ball, because she was picturing Lincoln as a thing to kick into her goal. (48)

[Leni comes in]Segment feeds the idea of Leni being a nice sister by having her get Lincoln away from Lynn. (49) Leni: "Don't be a dope. We talked about this tomorrow. Ugh... I mean yesterday." Leni correcting herself, because dumb people do that, right? (50)

'''[in Leni's room] Leni:''' "I think my design for the manotard is really working." That doesn't look like... whatever a manotard is. It looks like some kind of a tanktop with three spaces for breasts. (51)According to Urban Dictionary, a manotard is a male leotard with more give in the crotch area. The fact that this word is used in regards to Lincoln, an eleven-year-old boy, is worthy of a sin. - PPPReally? Checking, and... wow, Savino, you are f*cked up! (52)'''

Lincoln:''' "So, uh... let me ask you a hypothetical." [Leni stares at him] "I mean, a what if question." Even after eleven years of knowing her, Lincoln still thinks Leni has the mental capacity to know what a hypothetical is. '''(53)

Leni:' [pokes Lincoln with needle] ''"Landon! You're in huge trouble!" Leni is so stupid, she forgets her siblings' names. (54)Also, Leni, this is the second time you've poked Lincoln with that needle. At this point, I'm beginning to think that manotard is a cover-up, and you're actually performing acupuncture on him. Which, by the way, you are NOT smart enough to know how to perform properly. (55) Leni: "You know what happens when you make Lola mad!" I'm sure he does. But what I'm more confused about is why that overturned stool still has that shadow on its legs. Segment does not understand how shadows work. - PPP (56)  Leni: "Did I ever tell you about the tiara [pronounced tee-air-uh] crisis?" It's pronounced 'tee-ahr-uh', Leni. Do you not know how to pronounce stuff or something? (57) [Leni holds up Lola's broken tiara]Since when has Lola's tiara been a pink headband with a tiara on top? '''(58)

[Leni walks into her bedroom and falls to the floor, thinking her bed is there]'''Look, you want to tell me that Leni's stupid, that's fine. But don't tell me that Leni doesn't know she's walking into an empty space where her bed should be! '''(59)

[Leni's friends pop up behind Lincoln as he wears the manotard]'''Leni's friends have mastered the art of appearing from physically impossible places. Did they pop out of the same wormhole or something? (60)

[Lori paints her nails]So, which is it? Does Lori paint her toenails very sloppily, or does she paint them just fine? '''(61)

Lori:''' "Did I ever tell you about... sneeze-ageddon?" No, but unless a talking illuminati symbol is involved, I don't really give a f*ck about it. '''(62)

Lori:''' "Has anyone seen my phone?" [finds her phone in a boiler and screams]Every teenage girl's worst nightmare. '''- PPP (63)' Also, segment thinks Fatal Attraction'' is a popular movie with the show's target demographic. (64)

Lori: "Ah, ah, ah. I haven't done my top coat yet." Lori decides to paint her nails twice over so she can keep Lincoln from going to Lana. Who even paints their nails with two coats, anyways? All you need is one! '''(65)

[Lana tells Lincoln about the frog fiasco]''' Segment thinks it can bank another negative sin by having Lana cradling Izzy as she talks about how evil Lola is. And you know what? Segment is right. Take one sin off for this adorable moment of Lana's childish innocence! '''(64)

[Seymour's ribbitting causes Lola to smear her makeup]'''Lola's makeup being ruined. That's so sin-worthy, I can't even begin to describe it. - PPP(65)  Lana: "Aww, you're a burpy durpy today!" [to Lola] "Isn't he the cutest?" Lola: [menacingly] "Heeheehee... so cute." Lola is looking into a mirror, and Lana somehow doesn't see that her twin is doing an evil smile into the mirror. And is also deaf to her evil laughter. '''(66)

[Lana tries to feed... 'Seymoor'?]'''Lana named her frog a name that she can't even properly spell, and nobody ever bothered to correct her spelling error for her. (67)

[Izzy's name is plastered over Seymour's on the tank] Izzy's name plastered over Seymour's? But that can only mean... holy sh*t, Lana wasn't trying to scare Lincoln with a made-up story like the other sisters are! Lola actually killed her pet frog! This puts Frog Wild in a totally different light! No wonder Lana's so passionate about rescuing animals, she watched her own sister kill one! (68) Lana: "I mean, I can't prove she took out Seymour..." You watched her come out behind the shed with a shovel after finding that your frog went missing! How much more proof do you need?! '''(69)

[Lincoln grabs Lana by her overall straps]'''Lincoln is able to pull Lana's by her overall straps, without having them come unbuttoned. (70) Lincoln: "Lana, what am I gonna do?! It's almost 3:00!" However much time is between this moment and 3:00, it's enough for Lincoln to: polish Lola's tiaras... (71) ...and all those dozens of trophies of hers, (72)Clean her room... (73) ...at the same time he pours her tea, (74)Wash her car, (75)Mow the lawn, (76)Clean the gutters... (77)...and the driveway, (78)And make topiaries of herself, a teddy bear and a unicorn! Do Lincoln and Lana have Quicksilver's super-speed abilities, or does Royal Woods operate on a completely different time scale convenient for Lincoln getting done in hours that would take any normal person several days at shortest? (79)

[Lincoln cleans Lola's room while pouring her tea] While I'm sure Lola would love her room clean, I don't think she'd like seeing footprints on her teapot. '''(80)

[Lana is on the swing as Lincoln mows the lawn]'''As much as I want to take a sin off for how adorable this moment of Lana swinging is, I have to add one instead, as she's getting in the way of Lincoln mowing the lawn. And putting her and Lincoln's safety at risk doing so. '''(81)

Lincoln:''' "Why does Lola care whether the gutters are clean?" Better question: why DOESN'T Lola care that there's a boomerang and a frisbee on the roof that never get picked up? '''(82)

[Lincoln collapses in his bed]'''Lincoln is so exhausted from working, that his freckles have disappeared from his face. '''(83)

[Lola comes up the stairs and up to Lincoln's room]'''Lola has some kind of a light source following her that makes her more intimidating by giving her a giant shadow. (84)Also, 'giant shadow signifies something ominous' cliche. (85) Lola: "You know what happens when you make Lola MAAAAAD!" [fire shows in Lola's eyes] You remind the audience that your voice actress voiced another princess associated with fire? '''(86)

[Lincoln confesses to Lola]'''This shot of Lola towering over Lincoln like a giantess. You're gonna make me remove a sin for this, aren't you, Powerpuff? Dude. It's Lola towering over Lincoln like a giantess. Not removing a sin for this would be a mortal sin on its own. - PPP ...yep, I figured. Removing a sin! (85) Lola: "I know you didn't hear me. You're not as clever as you think, Lincoln Loud!" Leave the elaborate pranks to Luan, Lola. (86)

'''[Flashback] Lola:''' "Lincoln, is this too much mascara?" Any amount of mascara is too much for a six-year-old, Lola. Stop playing with those Bratz dolls and play with... oh, I don't know, a Judy Hopps doll. She's a good female role model. '''(87)

[Lola finds the Noise-B-Gone box in the garbage]''' So did Lincoln throw out the Noise-B-Gone box, or does he still have it to put his earbuds in? Why would Lincoln even WANT to throw out that box? (88) Lola: "Lincoln, are you the biggest dork in the world?" Lincoln: "You can say that again!" Lola: "And do you love the taste of dog poop?" Lincoln: "You know it!" Somebody wanted to get their scat fetish out of their system. '''- PPP (89) [Lola tells the other sisters minus Lisa]''' Luna: "No wonder he didn't help me restring my guitar." Lucy: "Or come to my seance." Luan: "And that's why he didn't laugh at my jokes." Lori: "...yeah, that's why." Subtly insulting Luan. - PPP(90) Luna: "You had it coming, little bro. You can't just ignore us. We're your family." So let me get this straight: you girls don't like it that Lincoln wants quiet time to himself, so you decide to prank him by making him do chores all day and telling made-up stories about how evil Lola is, just to teach him a lesson about ignoring you? That's... that's a dick move. And not a lesson you should be teaching anyone. Here's ten sins for teaching such a bullsh*t lesson! '''(100)

[Lisa runs into Lincoln's room]''' Lisa runs past her sisters as if they aren't even there. Because that's how solid matter works, right? '''(101)

Lisa:''' "You were supposed to help me with my lab experiment!" Lincoln: "You can give it a rest. I know all about your little joke." Lisa: "What joke?" [grabs earbuds] "I'm gonna need those." ''[experiment blows up in Lisa and Lily's room. The roof flips upside down onto the house]'' The house and the Loud kids survive this. (102)

Lincoln: "Now I can't hear anything!" You think that was bad? Try listening to your dad's subwoofer on full blast for a few years. Trust me, I know. '''- PPP (103)'''

Lincoln: "Now I can't hear anything!" So because Lincoln ignored Lisa when she needed help with her experiment, he is now deaf. Come to think of it, Lisa was quick to grab those earbuds before the explosion went off. Yeah... this was no accident. Lisa knew Lincoln was ignoring her with those earbuds, and set up that experiment to get back at Lincoln for refusing to help her. Forget Lola, Lisa's the real antagonist of this segment! And she's much sneakier about her evil ways than Lola. You know what happens when you make Lisa mad. And now that you do, you do NOT want to. '''(104)

Segment Sin Tally: '''==104==

''' Sentence: ==Quahog School for the Deaf'''==

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[Lincoln wants a moment's peace] [https://www.deviantart.com/users/outgoing?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hJyvKI3akI Lincoln: "This is the final straw. I am going to move so far away, that I will be able to brag about it. I would rather tear out my brain stem, carry it into the middle of the nearest four-way intersection, and skip rope with it, than go on living where I do now." TV Announcer: "Hi there! Is this the final straw? Do you want to move so far away, that you can brag about it? Would you rather tear out your brain stem, walk out into the middle of the nearest three-way--" Lincoln: "Four-way." TV Announcer: "...four-way intersection, and skip rope with it, than continue living where you do now?"]

''[Lincoln takes out the earbuds... 'and holds them up as the Legend of Zelda item collection sound plays']''

Lincoln: "So why stop at comics? Let the quiet times roll!" The Cars:  "Let the goooood tiiiiimes rollllllllll!"

[Lola tells Lincoln he wouldn't want to make her mad] Lola: [to Lincoln] "Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

[Lynn kickboxes to Guile's theme]

'''[Lola comes up to Lincoln's room] Lola:''' "Yes! We defeated you for all time! You will never rise from the ashes of your shame and humiliation!"

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Special thanks to my good friend  Powerpuff-Pony  for this collab!

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 SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT  On January 11th, I will be uploading Loud Sins on the most infamous and controversial segment of the series,  Brawl in the Family, to celebrate the one year anniversary of the segment. But this time, I'm doing it with a bit of a twist: instead of doing all the sins myself, I'm only gonna provide the first (for Kevin Sullivan) and last sin (for Viacom). So who's gonna write the rest of the sins, you may ask? Well, that's easy.

You will.

That's right, you, the reader, will be writing the sins on the most infamous segment of the series. Now, you may be wondering, how can I contribute? Well, that's easy. All you need to do is have a DeviantArt account, and send me any sins you would like to be featured in  Loud Sins: Brawl in the Family. And, if you're lucky and/or talented at sin-writing, your sin or sins will be featured. You have until December 31st at 11:59PM EST to submit your sins, so... get to writing! I'd love to see what you come up with.