User blog:Steven A. Lucas/Steven Lucas in The Loud House: Fed Up (FANFIC)

Hello, Steven here. Today, I am releasing Fed Up, which is also one of my favorite episodes of season 2. So as we all know that Thanksgiving is coming, and I'm still planning to release my own version of The Loudest Thanksgiving. Fed Up might be about food. In this version, I had a supporting role where I helped Lincoln and his sisters to stop their dad to make the same meals over a number of weeks. I also came up with an idea where I tried to cook barbecue ribs. I also added a gag to myself that meat shoes are a new fashion trend, but failed at it. I really hope you enjoy it. I don't own the rights for the characters, the stories, the locations, and the show. It belongs to its rightful owners, the creators, the writers, and the crew. Enjoy.

Steven Lucas in The Loud House

Fed Up

Originally Written by Jacob Fleisher

Re-Written by Steven A. Lucas

[Nighttime]

Lynn Sr.: "Dinner's ready! Come and get it!"

''[The sisters and Steven quickly rush out of their rooms, and excitedly head downstairs. As they head down the stairs, the frame suddenly freezes. Lincoln appears.]''

Lincoln: [to the viewers] "Yeah, so this never happens. Dad cooks all our dinners, and he's not a bad cook, but his repertoire is kind of limited." ''[Lincoln enters his room and pulls down a calendar. As he lists off the dishes mentioned, said dish appears on the calendar and head to their respective date.]'' "You've got Salisbury Steak Sundays, Meatball Mondays, Turkey Loaf Tuesdays, Wienerschnitzel Wednesdays, Goulash Thursdays, Fish Fry Fridays, and Succotash Saturdays." [the seven mentioned dishes then cover every week on the calendar.] "Then it all repeats, week, after week, after week. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go choke down some..."

[Cut to a rather sloppily made dish.]

Lynn Sr.: "...wienerschnitzel. Not to brag, but this tastes exactly like last Wednesday's, and I've got this recipe dialed in!"

[Lynn Sr. heads back into the kitchen.]

Steven: Okay, I thought we were just having hot dogs for dinner.

Lincoln: Sorry Steven, but our dad cooks our weekly dinners every day.

Steven: Aw man. Why can’t we just have something awesome like a burger or mac and cheese?

Rita: Well, my husband cooks best so don’t beat yourself up about it.

Steven: [Sighs]

[Lincoln pulls out a coin attached to a string and begins swinging it side to side in front of his face.]

Lola: "What are you doing?"

Lincoln: "Self hypnosis. Maybe it can make myself believe the wienerschnitzel tastes like ice cream."

Lola: [trying to steal Lincoln's coin] "Oh, I want ice cream! Move!"

Lincoln: [struggling to get his coin back] "Come up with your own coping mechanism!"

''[As Lincoln and Lola fight for the coin, they accidentally knock the wienerschnitzel off the table. As it begins hurling towards the floor, Lynn Sr. notices it falling and dives towards it to catch it.]''

Lynn Sr.: "No! No, no, no, no, no!" [the siblings look at their father, who has just saved the wienerschnitzel in time.]"Whew! That was close. I almost had to order us pizza. Ha ha."

''[Lynn Sr. leaves the scene. As Steven and Lincoln’s sisters sit back down, Lincoln suddenly has a realization.]''

[In the bathroom, Steven and the sisters are getting ready for bed.]

Leni: "You guys, I need an outfit for dinner tomorrow." [holds up a purple dress] "Does this print go with goulash?"

Lincoln: [comes in] "It doesn't matter, 'cause we're not having goulash tomorrow."

Lori: "Yes we are, Lincoln. We have it every Thursday, and there's literally nothing we can do about it."

Lucy: "She's right. It's all in my poem." [takes out poem] "Dinner. The same seven meals. How do you cope? The only plan is to give up hope. Dinner."

[The other sisters agree]

Leni: "So true."

Luan: "Say it, sister!"

Lisa: "Wise words."

Steven: Nice words of a young poet.

Lucy: Thank you for that compliment.

Lincoln: "Fine. I guess no one wants...pizza~."

[Steven and the sisters gasp]

Steven: Lincoln, that’s a great idea! We must have pizza.

[Lana pops out of the back of the toilet in scuba gear.]

Lana: "Did someone say "pizza"?"

Steven: Yes Lana. Lincoln and I said “pizza”. Lincoln, how did you find out about your idea of getting pizza, instead of dad’s goulash?

Lincoln: "When the schnitzel fell off the table, Dad said he almost had to order pizza. So, if we sabotage tomorrow's dinner, that's what we'll get. Now, huddle up." [Lana hops out of the toilet which disgusts him.] "Lana, why don't you rinse off first?"

Steven: [disgusted] Yeah. You don’t want to smell like an outhouse.

[The next day, Lynn Sr. comes home from the supermarket with groceries.]

Lynn Sr.: [singing] "♫I just came back from the grocery store, gonna get my goulash on / Noodles, tomatoes, meat galore, gonna get my goulash-♫"

Lincoln: [feigning curiosity] "Hey, Dad! There's something I've always wondered about. Why do you make goulash on Thursdays?"

Lynn Sr.: [laughs] "Oh, son. It's a funny story. Thursdays are a bit of a conundrum. Not many foods start with "TH"." [While he's not looking, Lisa uses a drone to grab the meat and Lana uses her fishing rod to snatch the noodles.]"There's Thai food, but coconut milk really does a number on the old Lynn-testines, if you know what I'm saying." [Lynn swoops in and grabs the tomatoes and Luna cuts a hole in the bag to drop an onion and put it in Lily's diaper.]"And three-bean salad; well, that's just three times as bad, right? Now there is a Greek dish called Thessalonikian sheep dip, but your mother finds it a little gamey."

Lincoln: [seeing his sisters and Steven having done their parts] "You're right. That is a funny story. Gotta go!" [leaves]

Lynn Sr: "But, son, I didn't tell you about threatened-species stir fry yet! It's very rare! Get it?"

[Inside the breadbox, a fake bread camera is filming Lynn Sr.'s actions and the kids check it out via laptop in Lori and Leni's room.]

Steven: Lisa, I gotta say. That bread camera is a good idea.

Lisa: Thank you, loyal visitor of Royal Woods. But I just can’t wait for that cheesy goodness.

Lincoln: "Good work, team! If my calculations are correct, Dad should be ordering pizza in..." [checks watch] "...T minus 15 seconds."

[Lynn Sr. checks his groceries only to find an orange inside.]

Lynn Sr.: [confused] "An orange? Where's all my goulash stuff? I know I bought it, 'cause I was singing about it! Dang it!" [sighs] "I guess I'll have to..."

Lincoln: "Three, two, one."

Lynn Sr.: "...go back to the store!"

Sisters: [disappointed] "Aw..."

Steven: Aw man.

Lisa: "I knew I should've chloroformed him. Unconscious people can't make goulash."

Lana: [holding up the rivets to the car's steering wheel] "Don't worry. Dad's not going anywhere."

[The steering wheel comes off]

Lynn Sr.: "Gah! Well, my horoscope did say Libras should expect the unexpected today." [goes back inside] "Bad news, kids. I gotta put the kibosh on tonight's goulash."

Kids: [feigning disappointment] "Aw..."

Steven: That’s a bummer.

Luan: "What a shame."

Lynn: "Too bad."

Lori: "I need to take a moment."

Lynn Sr.: "But fortunately, your old dad's got a backup plan."

Lola: "I'll get the phone, Daddy!"

Lynn Sr.: "I'm...making tomorrow's dinner tonight! Frank and beans Friday on Thursday. In your face, horoscope!" [leaves]

Lisa: "I'll get the chloroform."

[Steven stops Lisa]

Steven: Hold on Lisa. I think I got a better idea.

[Lynn Sr. gets the beans out of the pantry]

Lynn Sr.: [singing] "♫Franks and beans / Doo doo doo / Franks, yeah, yeah, / And beans and beans / And beans, and beans beans beans♫"

[Lincoln pops his head in with headphones.]

Lincoln: "Big Cheese to Toppings. Target is in position. Move out."

Luan: [grabs the speaker] "Be careful, guys. There's not mushroom for error." [laughs]

Lincoln: "Luan, this line is not for jokes!"

''[Lynn tosses her boomerang into the kitchen and snatches a can of beans. Lana has Hops grab another can with his tongue. Lisa pulls in the last one, and also her dad's belt, with a magnet. Lynn Sr.'s pants fall down.]''

Lynn Sr.: [taking notice] "My baked beans! What is happening? I guess there's only one thing to do." [Lincoln calls the pizza place on speed dial] "Make franks and lima beans!"

[The kids groan at their dad's determination.]

Steven: Of course, you realize. This means war!

[Lynn Sr. checks the drawers for the can opener but can't find it]

Lynn Sr.: "Where the heck is our can opener?"

[Luan sneaks it out and Lynn Sr. resorts to opening cans with Geo's teeth.]

Lynn Sr.: "Ah, thank you, Geo. Nothing like a little Lynn-genuity.

[Luan shakes her fist in rage.]

Lynn Sr.: [looking for the knives] "Where are the dang knives?" [holds up packets of wieners] "I've got 20 hot dogs to slice!"

''[Lori sneaks the knives away, and Lynn Sr. resorts to cutting the franks with ice skates. Leni gives his performance a perfect 10; Lincoln smacks the score card out of her hands. Lynn Sr. is about to put the chopped franks into the pot, but finds some unexpected guests.]''

Lynn Sr.: "Ah! Pot raccoons!"

[Steven carries a net, and gives a thumbs up, Lynn Sr. now puts the franks in a casserole dish]

Lynn Sr.: "No problem. We'll do a casserole."

''[He tries to open the oven, but the handle gets stuck and breaks off. Luna is holding a bottle of glue, showing that was her doing. Now, Lynn Sr. puts the ingredients in a coffee pot.]''

Lynn Sr.: "I'll just heat 'er up in the old coffee pot. That's using the old bean."

[Just as he turns the coffee pot on, Lola tugs on the power line with her princess car hooked to it and shuts off the power to the house.]

Lynn Sr.: "Dang it."

Lincoln: "I'm proud of you guys. It was touch-and-go for a while, but we all hung in there, and-"

Lynn Sr.: "Dinner's served!" [singing again] "♫Franks, franks and beans, they're lima / Franks and beans♫"

Kids: [flabbergasted] "WHAT?!"

''[Steven and the kids come in to the dining room. Steven acts a bit bamboozled]''

Steven: HOW?!

Lynn Sr.: "It's not exactly hot, but I'd rather eat cold beans than a plate of failure."

[As a last ditch effort, Lily tosses her rattle right on the floor, making Lynn Sr. trip over it and drop the dish which the raccoons quickly devour.]

Lynn Sr.: [defeated] "Someone get me the phone..."

[The kids smile and place three boxes of pizza on the table.]

Steven: Woo-hoo!

Lincoln: "Yes! Pizza!"

[Lincoln takes a bite and they all cheer.]

Steven: Ahh. That was delicious.

Lori: You literally got that right.

Leni: It’s so good.

Luna: That pizza is rockin’ dude.

Luan: I gotta hand it to you Lincoln, you have the “crust” to handle. [laughs] Get it?

Lynn: Man, they really know how make a mean pepperoni pizza.

Lana: Man, that sabotaging dinner really works up an appetite.

Lola: Yeah Lana, it tastes good.

Lisa: That cheese is so gooey, my taste buds can’t handle. Yum!

Lily: Poo-poo.

Lucy: Yeah, I now reworked on my poem that I’ve been working on.

[Lucy takes out her poem]

Lucy: [revising her poem] "Dinner. Goulash again? That's a nope. A bite of pizza; it tastes like hope. Dinner." [sheds a pizza slice shaped teardrop of happiness.]

[Lincoln, Steven, and the sisters clapped to Lucy]

Steven: Those are the finest words, of a true Gothic writer.

Lucy: Thanks Steven. I’m very happy to compliment my work.

Steven: But I would like a toast. [raises his cup] To Lincoln Loud, and his amazing plans. To Lincoln!

[The sisters raised their cups.]

Kids: To Lincoln!

[Later after dinner, Lincoln is relaxing in his room.]

Lincoln: [to the viewers] "Wow. What a night. Maybe next week we can get Dad to order Chinese."

Steven: You can say that again, Lincoln. I really think things will get better for us. And there’s no trouble to handle.

Lynn Sr.: [off-screen and angry] "WHY IS THERE MEAT IN MY SHOES?!"

Lincoln: [caught] "Dang it."

Steven: Uh-oh! Well, except for your parents. [disappointed] Oh boy, what did we do this time?

[The meat covered slippers are shown and the parents are unhappy with their kids and their guest.]

Steven: Oh. Right. That’s why.

Rita: "Does anyone have anything to say?"

[Steven tries to sort everything out by acting like a bad salesman.]

Steven: [acting] Uh. Haven’t you heard that meat slippers are a new trend. I mean you can wear footwear entirely made of meat. Of course, there’s prime rib, chicken, pork chops, burger meat, and our lucky favorite, beef steaks. So, come on down to your local grocery store to buy your meat shoes.

[Steven smiles awkwardly, but Lincoln’s parents are still unhappy]

Steven: [disappointed] Sorry, my salesman act is terrible.

[Steven walks back to Lincoln and his sisters]

Rita: Anybody else?

Lincoln: [whispering] "Leni, why would you hide the meat in the slippers Dad wears every night?"

Leni: [Whispering] "Because his pockets were full."

Steven: [Whispering] Well, what did you fill his pockets with?

Leni: [Whispering] I believe it’s macaroni.

Lynn Sr.: [pulling out pasta from his pockets] "What is this? Pasta? Someone please explain why I'm wearing my goulash?"

Steven: Goulash shmoulash, nobody cares about goulash. [confesses] Alright Mr. and Mrs. Loud you caught us. Lincoln, please tell them the truth about what we did.

Lincoln: "We did it, Dad. We sabotaged dinner so you'd order us pizza." [his parents gasp] "We're really sorry. But eating the same dinners over and over again was driving us crazy."

Steven: Yeah, especially their dad, because I don’t really know how he cooks franks and beans in a coffee pot without electricity. But man, this guy’s good at everything.

Rita: [Unamused] "You guys have no idea how hard it is to cook seven nutritious meals a week for 14 different people on a budget. I'd say your dad does a pretty great job."

Lynn Sr.: [thankful] "Aw, that means a lot, honey."

Rita: "You'll understand someday when you have to cook for your own family."

Lincoln: "Cook for your own family? That's it! Let  us  make dinner tomorrow night. We have tons of ideas. Dad will get a break, we'll make something delicious and show you it's not that hard to mix up the meal."

Steven: Yeah. That way you can just sit back and relax and let us prepare our meal for all of us. So what do you say? [smiles widely]

[Their parents take it in for a second.]

Lynn Sr.: "Fine by me."

[As they leave, it's revealed Leni hid the vegetables in his robe and she grabs an onion from it.]

Leni: "Ooh! We could probably use this onion."

[The next day, the kids are getting ready to make dinner and Lincoln takes out some bread and cheese.]

Steven: So how does this work Lincoln. I mean, we can just make something simple or challenging. I mean I’m starting to worry about eating every meal, every week.

Lincoln: "Remember, guys, this is about more than just tonight's dinner. These grilled cheeses really have to change hearts and minds."

Lola: "Grilled cheese? I wanna make a cake!"

Lori: "I can't eat cake for dinner. I'll literally break out!"

Luna: "Let's make shepherd's pie! It's Mick Swagger's favorite, dudes.

Leni: "You guys, I got it. Let's make goulash!"

Lincoln: "We did all this so we wouldn't have to eat goulash!"

Leni: "And now I miss it."

Lisa: "Might I suggest something more sophisticated? Perhaps a vichyssoise?"

Lynn: [makes a buzzer sound] "We need body fuel. I'll blend us up some protein shakes."

Lola: "Your brain's been blended if you think I'm drinking that barf."

Lana: [excited] "Wait! We can drink barf?"

Steven: Ew. NO! Maybe I should take a chance to make my famous barbecue ribs for everyone.

[The kids all start arguing over what to make.]

Lincoln: "Grilled cheese beats all!"

Lynn: "Protein shake!"

Lola: "Cake!"

[Lori bangs a pan and spoon together to get their attention.]

Lori: "Guys, guys, stop! We'll do a potluck. Everyone will make their own dish."

Lincoln: "Great idea. Then we'll have nothing to fight about."

''[At night, it cut to them all making a mess in the kitchen. Lucy and Lana are fighting over an egg.]''

Lana: "It's mine! I need it for my scrambly eggs!"

Lucy: "Well, I need it for my deviled eggs."

[Their force causes the egg to break and the yolk lands on Lily's head.]

Luan: "Mind if I poach that?" [laughs and scoops the yolk up in a bowl] "Get it?"

''[Lily laughs at the joke. Luan goes over to the counter and the blender spews Lynn's protein shake all over Luan's face, causing her to trip onto Lincoln with his grilled cheese. Lori then trips over them, slips on the fridge, and gets buried by its contents.]''

Lori: [weakly] "Literally?"

[Steven takes out a bowl of barbecue sauce in the fridge, puts it on the counter to smother on a rack of ribs.]

Steven: Come on Steven, you got this. [continues smothering the ribs]

[Leni tries using the microwave, but it short-circuits and sets off the smoke detector and Luna grabs a linen to blow the smoke away from it, but the linen was holding up the pot with Lisa's vichyssoise which spills over.]

Lisa: "MY VICHYSSOISE!"

[As Luna fails to blow the smoke away, Lynn smacks the detector away with her lacrosse net, but the detector crashes into Lola's cake.]

Lola: [gasps with a face full of frosting] "MY CAKE!"

''[Enraged, Lola attacks Lynn and Luna and the fight cloud carries over to the rest of the kids in the kitchen. Meanwhile, Lynn Sr. and Rita are in the dining room waiting.]''

Lynn Sr.: "Guys? Everything okay in there?"

[The kids stop fighting and calmly say that everything's fine.]

Leni: "Like, awesome!"

Lana: "Super!"

Steven: Everything’s alright Mr. Loud.

Lynn Sr.: "Good! Your mom and I are getting hungry for dinner! Hope you're almost ready to fork it over!"

Steven: [Laughs awkwardly] Yeah a joke about forks. [Then he panics] What are we gonna do!

Lori: "You guys, we've got nothing!"

Lincoln: "Failure is not an option! We have to serve something, or we'll be eating the same seven dinners forever!"

[The sisters and Steven nod in agreement]

[Dinner is served]

Lynn Sr.: "Wow. You made, uh..."

[The dish is a bizarre mixture of different foods they combined into one at the last minute.]

Lisa: "Potatoes."

Lori: "Quinoa."

Luan: "Turkey."

Lucy: "Chicken."

Luna: "Meatloaf."

Lynn: "Bologna."

Lola: "Frosting."

Lincoln: "Cereal."

Leni: "Goulash."

Lana: "Barf."

Steven: “Ribs.”

[Rita and Lynn Sr. look unsure]

Lincoln: "Well, bon appétit!"

''[They all nervously take a spoonful of the stuff and take a bite out of it. Rita gags, obviously not liking it.]''

Rita: [trying not to upset her children] "Mmm, it's, uh..."

[She gags again and the kids all spit it out and point out how truly awful it tastes.]

Steven: Blech. This taste awful.

Lori: "I can't get it off my tongue!"

Lincoln: "Mom, Dad, we're sorry. You were right. Cooking for this many people is a nightmare. We'll never complain about your food again."

[His sisters and Steven all agree]

Steven: Yeah, we’re sorry.

Lana: "We promise."

Luan: "We didn't mean it."

Lola: "I'm not keeping that promise." [smiles innocently]

Lynn: "Now that we totally learned our lesson, can we order pizza?"

Siblings: [excited] "Pizza!"

Steven: Barbecue!

Lana: "Indian!"

Rita: "Sorry, kids. Our food budget for this week is shot."

Lana: "So we're not having any dinner?"

Steven: Does this mean we’re gonna starve tonight. Or worse, forever.

Lynn Sr.: "Nonsense! Necessity is the mother of Lynn-vention! To the kitchen!"

[The messy kitchen]

Lynn Sr.: "So, what have we got?"

[The kids check to see what's left.]

Steven: I have a piece of cheese.

Lincoln: "I found a jar of olives!"

Lori: "This spoon still has a little mustard on it."

Lynn: "And I've got some chopped up sports bars."

Luna: "And I've got some jams!"

Luan: "Ooh! Where?" [Luna holds up her guitar] "Oh. Those kind of jams."

[Luna starts playing while Lynn Sr. starts cooking.]

Lynn Sr.: "Olives." [is handed the olives] "Pepper." [is handed the pepper] "Baking pan." [is handed only half of it]"Other half of baking pan." [is handed the other half] "Tape. Stat, man! Stat!"

[Lily hands him the tape, Luna keeps jamming, and Luan wipes his brow.]

Leni: "What are you making, Dad?"

Lynn Sr.: "I'm not really sure, but let's call it...Casa Loud Casserole!" [holds up the casserole containing the olives, pepper, sports bars, mustard, and anything else in it.]

Leni: "Ooh! I have the perfect outfit for that!"

[Later, after dinner, everyone is stuffed and satisfied and Leni is wearing a red dress.]

Rita: "Honey, that was delicious."

[The kids and Steven agree]

Steven: It’s great, Mr. Loud.

Lola: Amazing!

Leni: "So good!"

Lynn Sr.: "Thank you. I think you kids were right. It's time I started mixing up the menu."

Kids: [excited] "Really?!"

Lynn Sr.: "Yep. In fact, I'm going to the store right now to get some new Lynn-gredients."

[He heads to the car and the kids cheer to finally having some new dinners, but the car crashes off-screen.]

Steven: Ow. Is he alright?

Lana: "Oops. Heh, heh." [holds up the brake pads] "Forgot to put the brake pads back on." [smiles nervously]