The quotations in the following transcript are owned by Paramount Skydance and are an exception to The Loud House Encyclopedia's CC-BY-SA license. This transcript is provided in full as a source of review and reference, which likely falls under fair use.
[Great Lakes City; Lori and Bobby are eating at a place called Big Joey's Uptown Pizza.] Bobby: "To us, babe, On the anniversary of our first pizza date."
[The couple both clink their soda cups together, suddenly their moment is interrupted by a meowing sound. The camera pans over to the right to find a small kitten standing on a crate. The feline looks sad as it lets out another upset meow.] Lori: "Oh, Boo-Boo Bear, That's literally the cutest kitten i've ever seen." [As Lori is talking, the kitten notices as butterfly and tries to catch it, only to miss and fall over] Bobby: "Ooh, Maybe the lil guy is hungry." [Bobby takes a piece of pepperoni from a slice of pizza and throws it to the kitten. The starved kitten eats the slice and lets out a now satiated meow. The kitty then hops off the crate and walks towards the lovebirds.] Bobby: "Awww, He loves spicy pepperoni, Here you go buddy, Have a last slice." [He grabs the slice of a pizza and throws it onto the kitten, who then swallows it up in one bite, letting out a little meow.] Bobby: "Oh, He eats like Abuelo." Lori: "Well, Time for us to go." [starts petting the kitten] Bye bye cutest kitty." [They wave goodbye to the kitten as they walk off, but then it starts to follow the couple. Lori and Bobby are holding hands while walking when they suddenly hear the kitten meowing. Bobby lets out a gasp as the kitten nuzzles his leg.] Bobby: "No more pepperoni little guy, Go home to your cat parents, or your legal cat guardians." [They continue walking, but then the kitten starts meowing at them to grab their attention, then looks at them with puppy dog eyes.] Bobby and Lori: "Awww.." Lori: "But what if he doesn't have a home, We can't just abandon him." Bobby: "What are we gonna do?" Bobby and Lori: "I guess i can take him, Jinx!" Lori: "Wait a minute, This makes perfect sense, We can co parent the kitten." Bobby: "That's genius, babe, I'll take him one week, then you take him for one week." Lori:[grabs the kitty] "Now, What should we call you?" Bobby: "Since he loves pepperoni so much, We can call him..." Bobby and Lori: "Pep-purr-oni! Gah, Jinx again." [The couple then laugh as they all share a group hug with the newly named "Peppurroni", who meows in delight.]
[The scene fades into the Casagrande Apartment complex. Bobby enters his own apartment with some shopping] Bobby:"Oh, Peppurroni! Daddy brought home your favorite." [Bobby holds up several cans of cat food, causing an excited Peppurroni to jump on top of them and lick Bobby's face. Later they're play a Muscle Fish fighting game, with Peppuroni's character beating Bobby's character] Bobby: "Wow, You're getting good at this, buddy." [Bobby's phone then rings, which he then answers.] Lori: "Hey, Boo-Boo Bear, How's our little Peppurroni?" Bobby: "He's doing great, Hey Peppurroni, Say hi to Mommy." [Peppuroni, who is still playing the game, gives Lori a little meow before going back to gaming.] Lori: "Bobby, Is Peppurroni playing video games?" Bobby: "I know what you're thinking, It's dinner time, But he had a big anchovy lunch, and i made him a Leche Hat," [he holds up a cow themed drinking hat with milk bottles, which he then places on Peppuroni's head as the kitten drinks from it] "So he could drink, and play at the same time." Lori:[feeling nervous] "Ooh, Anchovies and milk. Yum! Um, but, um, I'm not sure screen time is good for a cat, Especially right before bed." Bobby: "Ah, don't worry, He's not going straight to bed, Peppurroni is hanging with his new pals tonight." [Camera pans over to a group of fierce looking alley cats standing by Bobby's bedroom window. They all let out vicious meows and hisses, causing Lori to scream in fright] Lori: "OMG, Bobby, You're letting him play with alley cats?" Bobby: "Oh, Babe, Relax, Kitties will be kitties." [Peppuroni and the alley cats then get into a fight with one another. Bobby then gets caught in their scuffle, causing him to get scratched and stripped down to his underwear in the process] Bobby: "See, He's having so much fun." [All Lori can do is wince at Bobby's injured state]
One Week Later [Lori is bringing Peppurroni back to her apartment, along with a duffle bag] Lori: "Here we are, Peppurroni, Home sweet calm, quiet home" [Lets Peppuroni out of his cage] Now, While you get comfortable, I will check out what Daddy packed for us." [She opens the bag, only to her shock, it's packed full of video games, comics, snacks and the milk drink hat.] Lori: "You won't be needing these." [she tosses the bag away, while laughing. She then notices Peppuroni clawing at her couch] "Oh! oh! Oh no no no! The furniture is off limits." [she picks up the kitten and places him onto a cat bed] "Isn't that much better?" [Peppuroni lets out a satisfied meow as it claws on the bed.] Lori: "Yes it is."
[Bobby's apartment; He's on the phone with Lori.] Bobby: "Hey, Babe, Just checking in on Peppurroni, heh, I really miss the little guy." Lori: "Aww, We miss you too." [She holds up her phone as she brings Peppuroni into the camera view. The kitten is now wearing clothing of some kind and eating a salad] Bobby: "Is he, wearing a sweater, and eating a salad?" Lori: "Oh, They're pajamas, I knitted them myself, along with these kitty yoga pants." [holds up a pair of small kitten sized yoga pants] Aren't they cute?" Bobby: "Aww, heh heh. Anyway, uh, maybe after yoga, you guys can play the video game i left you." Lori: "Screen time's not great for cats. So, I bought Peppurroni a super fun cat toy." [laughs] [Lori holds up a Fun Cube cat toy, which has a slogan saying Fun and safe in three dimensions.] Bobby:[feeling nervous] "Oh, Amazing, Looks so fun." Lori: "My thoughts exactly. Anyway, We better get ready for bed, say good night to Daddy." [She once again holds up her phone while bringing Peppuroni into the view. Peppuroni lets out a goodbye meow] Bobby:[now tearing up] "Good night Peppurroni... [Holds back his tears] Oh, You're gonna be okay."
One Week Later [Peppuroni is now inside a cat carrieer as Bobby prepares to take him from Lori for the week.] Bobby: "Who's my kitty witty?" Lori: "Bobby, I need you to focus." [She gives Bobby a duffel bag] "Here's his sun hat, his city wardrobe, and his parasal, oh, and could you make sure he gets the recommended 19 hours of sleep? It's all in the cat parenting books i bought us." [Lori places a series of books into the duffel bag] Bobby: "Babe," [places the items into the back of the Mercado truck] don't you think you're being a little strict? He's a kitten." Lori: "I know, but kittens needs structure and boundaries." Bobby: "They also need other things like fun, and little cat trampolines." Lori: "Huh, Well, I guess we have to agree to disagree, We can just take care of Peppurroni in our own way when it's our turn." Bobby: "The best of both worlds [takes the bag containing Peppuroni] Come on little guy, Let's get you out of that steamy bubble." Lori: "Oh, be careful, Make sure to put a seatbelt on him." [The Mercado van drives off leaving behind dust, causing Lori to cough. Lori then gasps as to her horror, she sees Bobby is driving too fast, causing Peppuroni, who's leaning out of the window to get blasted by strong winds.] Lori: "OMG, Bobby is literally the worst cat parent ever, I need backup." [She gets out her phone and dials a number. Carl is revealed to be on the other end, lounging at the Mercado front desk] Carl: "You've reached El Guapo." Lori: "Hey Carl, How would you like to earn some quick cash?" Carl: "You have El Guapo's attention." Lori: "I need you to do some." [coughs] "Let's call it, pet sitting, I'm not sure Bobby is up to the challenge of being a cat parent." Hector:[off-screen] "Carl, watch the register, Bobby locked himself out of the van at the Gas station again." Carl: "Yeah, Bobby's not even up to the challenge of being a human, What do i gotta do?"
[Bobby's Apartment]Lori:[voiceover] "First, I need you to replace Peppurroni's anchovies with my healthy organic Cat food, but Bobby cannot know, So don't get caught." [Carl sneaks into Bobby's apartment with a rope tied around his waist. He then replaces the fish with Good Green Gracious' Organic Kitty Feed. But then Carl suddenly notices Bobby heading right towards his way. Not wanting his cover to be blown, he eats the discarded anchovies, causing him to get sick. He then uses the rope to escape through the window, as he retches offscreen.] Lori:[voiceover] "Also, I don't want Peppurroni running around with those alley cats all night, so when Bobby lets him out, i need you to grab him, and take him to your room." [Later that night, Bobby lets Peppuroni out through the window. Carl attempts to grab the kitten, but the feline tries to fight back] Carl: "Shhh, It's just Tio Carl." [The Alley Cats show up to surround Carl.] Carl: "I hate gatos." [Cut to a shot of the Great Lakes City skyline as the cats proceed to maul him offscreen] "NOT THE FACE!!!" Lori:[voiceover] "After Bobby goes to bed, I need you to sneak in, and put on Peppurroni's pajamas, so he doesn't get cold." [Carl sneaks into Bobby's bedroom to try and put the cat pajamas on Peppuroni, only for the feline to wake up and attack him. The resulting fight causes Carl to get stuck in the pajamas, while Peppuroni lets out a victorious meow.]
One Week Later [Outside the Casagrandes Apartment, Bobby hands Peppuroni, who is in the cat carrier, over to Lori as she places him in Eliza's passenger seat.] Bobby: "We had the best time, Although there were scratch marks around his bed this morning, almost as if he got into a fight." Lori: "Weird, He must be, Uh, sleep scratching." [She gives Bobby a goodbye kiss] "We're off." Bobby: "Have fun!" [Lori puts on some classical music as she and Peppuroni drive away.] Bobby: "As if, She's gonna bore the nine lives out of him. I need backup." [Bobby dials a number on his phone] [Cut to the Loud House living room; Lola is relaxing on the couch with a facemask, while Lily is panting her toenails. The house phone rings as Lola picks it up.] Lola: "Speak." Bobby: "Hey, Lola, How would my favorite Loud sibling like to make a little extra cash?" Lola:[intrigued] "Ooh!" [laughs] "She would like that very much."
[Lori's Apartment; Lori is in the shower humming.] Bobby:[voiceover] "First thing i need you to do is replace that foochy cat food." [Lola sneaks into Lori's apartment and replaces the health food with a can of anchovies. Suddenly she hears Lori about to get out of the shower. Not wanting her cover to be blown, she eats the discarded organic cat food causing her to get sick. She then runs out of the apartment and retches offscreen.] Bobby:[voiceover] "And make sure that Peppurroni gets outside to play." [Lori is preparing to make a smoothie, while Peppuroni plays with his cube toy. Lola appears by the window and uses a fishing rod to lure Peppuroni outside using a tin of anchovies as bait. The kitten notices the fish and follows it as Lola begins to reel the bait in.] Lola: "That's it, keep coming boy." [Peppurroni grabs the food attached to the end of the line, but then releases it, causing the food to hit Lola in the face, knocking her over.] Bobby:[voiceover] "And don't forget to take off those itchy pajamas Lori makes him wear." [Later that night, Peppuroni is sleeping in his cat bed. Lola attempts to take the pajamas off the kitten, but then he wakes up and spots her] Lola: "Huh?" [Peppurroni starts attacking Lola. The resulting fight causes Lola to get tied up in yarn. Lola gulps as Peppuroni yanks her offscreen using the other end of the string. The exterior shot of Lori's apartment is shown as she continues to get attacked by the kitten.]
One Week Later [Lori is handing Peppuroni over to Bobby] Bobby: "So, How did you guys do?" Lori: "Great." Bobby: "Alright, Co-Cat parenting is really working out." [He gives her a kiss] Lori: "Totally." Bobby: "Bye Babe." Lori: "Drive safe." [Bobby drives off in the Mercado van. The spluttering engine startles her. Then she calls Carl again; he is once again lounging at the Mercado front desk, but this time he is covered in band aids and scratches.] Lori: "Hey Carl, Time for round 2." Carl: "Sorry, chica, I'm out of the gato game, I'd rather use generic hair gel than do this job." Lori:[ends the call as she groans in frustration] "Looks like i'm on my own." [Lori then drives from Royal Woods all the way to Great Lakes City in Eliza]
[Night time; Bobby's Apartment; Lori sneaks in through his bedroom window with a duffle bag. However, she is spotted by Peppuroni as he lets out an excited meow.] Lori: "Shhh, Quiet for mommy." [She takes out the kitten's pajamas from her duffle bag and puts them on Peppuroni] Bobby:[offscreen] "Where's my little Peppurroni?" [Lori gasps knowing Bobby is about to enter the room. With no other options, she hides under the bed.] Bobby: "There he is, There he- Huh?" [Bobby finds Lori struggling to hide under his bed. She's managed to get her head underneath but can't seem to get the rest of her body to fit, only for her to then collapse.] Bobby:[confused] "Lori?" Lori:[springing up from off the floor] "Surprise, Happy Cat... Parent... iversary!" Bobby: "But... it hasn't been a month yet, Unless we're celebrating by week. Wait a minute... [suddenly notices the items Lori brought into his bedroom] Bland cat salad? boring toys? Itchy homemade PJs?!" [gasps] "You're not here for our early Cat-parent-iversary, you're sneaking around my back, Taking care of Peppurroni! How could you?!!" Hector:[offscreen] "Bobby, Lola called to say your hundred dollar check bounced, so she's done doing your dirty gato work." Lori:[gasps] "You were doing the same thing!" Carl:[offscreen from outside] "Bobby paid her an hundy?! Lori only paid me 80 lousy bucks!" Bobby:[Does the longest gasp he can] "You had Carl helping you too?!!" Lori: "Oh, quit gasping, Peppurroni needed one responsible parent!" Bobby: "Yeah?! Well I had to make sure he wasn't bored to tears!" [Whilst arguing, Pepurroni is watching their fight with a scared look on his face] Lori: "Bored? I took him to Cat yoga!" Bobby: "Yeah, Not exactly a kitty's favorite past time!" Lori: "Oh yeah?! Then why was he purring his head off?!" Bobby: "Was he purring, or was he groaning?!" Lori: "I think i know what a purr sounds like, it's like..." [Lori starts making a purring sound] Bobby: "No, It's like." [Then Bobby starts purring too. This results in a purring battle between the two of them. Their purring battle causes a now annoyed Peppuroni to shake his head, as he walks off.] Lori: "You know what? This is ridiculous, Let's ask Peppurroni who he wants to be with." [They turn around, only to find that Peppurroni is now gone.] Lori: "Peppurroni?" [gasps] Bobby: "He must have gone out the window!" Lori:[now crying] "This is all our fault! Our bickering must have scared him!" Bobby: "Don't worry babe, We'll find him, He couldn't have gone far." [They peak out of the window in search for the runaway kitten, only for Bobby to notice a piece of string caught on the fire escape handrail.] Bobby: "Hey look, The yarn from his sweater, If we follow it, It should lead us right to Peppurroni." Lori: "And maybe we can use the anchovies to lure him out."
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[Lori and Bobby follow the string trail in order to find the lost feline, which leads them outside of the apartment.] Bobby: "Hey, Come out buddy." Lori: "Peppurroni?" Bobby:[peaks out from under a manhole] "Peppurroni?" Lori:[looks inside inside a trashcan] "Peppurroni?" [A giant rat pops out from the trash can, scaring Lori off.]''
[Lori and Bobby are still out looking for Peppuroni] Lori: "Here, little fella!" Bobby: "Where are you?!" Lori: "Come here, boy!" Bobby: "Daddy's worried!" Lori:[gasps] "There he is!" [Camera pans over to Big Joey's Uptown Pizza, the very place they first met him, where they find Peppuroni on the table scratching himself.] Lori: "Peppurroni, Our baby!" [She happily embraces and nuzzles the kitten, who simply meows in response] Bobby: "You scared us, Buddy!" [pets Peppuroni's head] Lori: "Boo-Boo Bear, I'm sorry for how i acted, We may have different cat parenting styles, But when it really matters, We work together well." Bobby: "You read my mind, babe, For now on, Let's try to be cool with each others styles, and meet each other half way." [Their moment is interrupted by a series of meows. The camera pans over to a dumpster to find two giant grey adult cats. Peppuroni, recognising who they are, jumps out of Lori's arms to join them. The three cats then happily embrace one another.] Lori: "OMG, Those must be his real parents." Chef: "Purrmesan, You're home! Bon appetito!" [The chef, revealed to be the real owner of Peppuroni/Purrmesan, places a bunch of pizza slices in front of the kitten as he laughs. ] Bobby: "Purrmesan? Our name was better." Lori: "Heh, Literally." [The couple look on at the cat family eating their pizza slices.] Bobby: "Well, babe, Looks like he has everything he needs." Lori: "I guess this is goodbye then." [waves goodbye to Peppuroni/Purrmesan] Bobby: "Yeah, We'll miss you, little guy, But we're glad you're home." [Suddenly, the irate alley cats from earlier surround the couple] Lori: "Bobby, You're still carrying that can of anchovies, aren't you?" [Bobby removes the anchovies from his pocket, as the hungry cats smile devilishly.] Bobby: "Run!" [The cats proceed to attack the couple offscreen, as the episode ends]
