Hey man, I just wanted come on her to make a request about the PTTFW series. I was thinking it'd be a cool idea to expand it so the Louds would react not only to fanfictions, but also to episode reviews and lists.
I just blazed through the fanfic, and here are my notes:
- I'm always a sucker for cute sibling bonding moments, so you have me sold on that. On top of that, I like the idea of Lincoln seeking reassurance from his sister after just having a nightmare about her. That said, I think it would help to establish earlier that Lincoln's nightmare involved Lori - show his apprehension when approaching her, and maybe have him flinch when she snaps at him.
- Secondly - and I'm only saying this to help you - you really need to either take more time to proofread or look for a beta reader. I noticed numerous errors in the first paragraph alone ("jolt his head out of his head", "it's" when you meant "its", "hollister" in place of "holster") (and on a more nitpicky note, the holster holds the gun, not the bullets. The barrel is what the bullets come out of).
Thanks! I appreciate the feedback! I’m hoping to someday update the fic and fix the errors, and advice like this can not only help me fix the fic, but also when it comes to the other fanfics I’m hoping to write.
Can you have the LKs do short reviews of some of my fanfics? Not like PTTFW episodes (like the ones with Nolans fanfics) just short, 1-2 paragraph long essays or scripts. If you dont want to do that then thats fine, but I've always wanted my fanfics to be citicized by the great MrTyeDye.