The following is a transcript for the episode "Senior Moment".
[It's nighttime in Royal Woods, Lori and Rita are driving along]
Lori: "Thanks for giving me a ride to the movies, Mom."
Rita: "Of course, I love that you and your friends have such a fun Friday tradition. What are you seeing tonight?"
Lori: "It's called Senior Year in Gear, everyone's saying it's literally the best teen movie ever, it got a hundred loves on Dank Potatoes."
Rita: "Oh, I'll assume that's a good thing." [They pull up in front of the movie theatre. Lori gets out] "Say hi to Carol and Roger for me, fingers crossed that they're not out of choco-crispies this time."
Lori: "Oh, we couldn't risk that happening again."
[Takes three out of her purse. Mother and daughter laugh. Lori enters the theatre and approaches the concession line]
Roger: "Lori!" [He and Carol are already at the front] "Over here!"
[Lori joins them]
Concessions Worker: "Hey! My favourite customers!" [Pulls out their usual order] "One large popcorn, one jumbo sparkling water, and... oh... sorry, we're still out of choco-crispies."
[Carol and Roger gasp, shocked, then Lori clears her throat and subtly points at her purse, Carol and Roger gasp in delight. The three go in to see the movie and are very excited. In the movie, a group of three seniors approach their school's landmark and paint their mark on it]
Teen Girl #1: "Now the school rock has been claimed by the cheerleading squad. Best senior year ever!"
[Lori, Carol and Roger laugh. Next, the movie teens are backing up a dump truck towards the schools swimming pool]
Teen Girl #2: "This senior prank is going to be like, so epic."
[The truck dumps powder into the pool]
Movie Teens: "Gelatin! Gelatin!"
[The gelatin powder sets and the pool is now full of lime jelly]
Teen Boy: [Bouncing on the dive board] "Look out, guys! I'm crazy!" [Dives into the pool, and bounces offscreen]
Teen Girls: "Best senior year ever!"
[Lori and her friends continue to enjoy. Next, the movie teens are laying back on the football field]
Teen Girl #1: "Stargazing on the football field? Such a high school right of passage."
Teen Boy: "Best senior year ever."
[The movie teens go swimming in a lake, later they sit back on the shore and watch the stars]
Teen Girl #2: "What a perfect end to senior year."
Teen Girl #1: "Yeah, someday we'll be super old, but we'll always remember this night."
Movie Teens: "Seniors!"
[The movie ends]
Roger: "That was amazing." [Sniffles] "I have chills."
Carol: [Wipes a tear] "Right? I thought that documentary about sea snails was great, but this like blew my mind!"
[They notice Lori looking less than cheerful]
Roger: "Woah, what's wrong, Lori? Are you mad I finished off the popcorn? Cause you said you were done."
Lori: "It's not about the popcorn, it's about the movie. It's just, we haven't done any of the high school stuff the characters did."
Carol: "What are you talking about Lori?"
Lori: "Those are literally rights of passage, we have to do them before we graduate, and senior year is almost over. Come on, one day we're going to look back at high school and regret all the stuff we missed out on."
Roger: "Guess you're right, we don't want that."
Carol: "Well, I'm down to start making some senior year memories."
Lori: "I knew I could count on you guys."
All Three: [High five] "Seniors!"
[Later, at their school's acorn monument, Lori, Carol and Roger sneak up]
Lori: [Extremely giddy] "Time to claim the school acorn for the golf team!" [They take out their paint and get vandalizing] "Best senior year ever." [Puts the paint down and takes out her phone] "Selfie time!"
[They prepare to take a photo with their little art project when suddenly they get hit with more paint]
Roger: "What the heck?!"
[There's another painting done for the...]
Swim Team Boy #1: "Swim Team!" [To the golfers] "We claim the school acorn for the swim team."
Carol: "Seriously guys? We just finished."
Swim Team Boy: "Anyone can paint the acorn anytime they want."
Lori: [Aggravated] "Oh, well, in that case."
[Crosses out the swim teams mural. The swim team gasps]
Swim Team Boy: "Why you!"
[They scribble over the golfers mural]
Lori: [Gasps, and scribbles over the swim teams mural again] "Golf team!"
Swim Team Boy: [As they scribble over the golf team's mural] "Swim team!"
Carol: "Maybe we should just leave."
Lori: "No way! We need a selfie with the acorn."
[One of the swim team boys throws paint at Roger]
Roger: "Gah! This is my best polo!" [Gets between everyone] "Truce!" [Lori throws her paintbrush, and it hits a swim team boy] "Okay, now it's a truce."
Swim Team Boy: "Yeah," [They leave] "you guys are loony."
Lori: "Come on guys, look, I can still make out a golf club." [Brings them in and takes the selfie] "Seniors! Okay, now for the captions. Hot mess, Yes! Paint-splosion! Best Senior Year Ever. And post."
[Next, Lori stealthily sneaks down the hall to the school exit, while Carol and Roger casually walk behind her, Lori looks around, and opens the door for Lincoln's farm friend]
Lori: "You got the goods?"
Liam: "Sure do, brought my four finest." [Has four pigs]
Lori: Perfect! Now we just have to put the jerseys on these little guys and set them loose in the school."
[Tosses four numbered jerseys to Carol and Roger, they open them and Carol notices something]
Carol: "Wait, you're missing a number four jersey."
Lori: "That's the prank, there is no number four, so the school will find pigs one, two, three, and five, but will go crazy looking for the missing pig."
Carol: [In unison] "Lori, you're a genius."
Roger: [In unison] "That is so funny."
Lori: "Here piggy, piggy, piggy."
[She tries to grab one, but it slips out of her hands]
Liam: "Ooh, sorry 'bout that, they got their weekly greasin' this morn."
Lori: "No problem, I've totally got this." [Just then, the pigs decide to explore] "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, they need their numbers or the prank doesn't work." [Gives chase] "Get 'em."
[They all start chasing a pig]
Liam: [Who's more experienced with stuff like this] "Got one."
Lori: [Uncertain] "This is fine, we can salvage this. Liam, can you hold the pig up?"
Liam: "Yes I can."
[Liam does so, and Lori pulls her friend in to take a selfie with it]
Lori: "Seniors! And captions. Piggy prank. Best senior year ever. And post."
Roger: [Sees the pig eating his polo] "Ah! This is my second best polo."
[Next, they all walk onto the football field]
Lori: [Sighs] "Stargazing on the football field. Best senior year ever."
Carol: [Swatting the mosquitoes] "Lori, there are like a ton of bugs out here."
Lori: [Spreads the blanket] "It's fine Carol, just lie down." [They lay on the blanket] "This is so magical. Right guys?" [Carol and Roger are too busy scratching to really answer, Lori, brings them closer and sighs] "Magical."
[Out of nowhere, the sprinklers turn on, they yelp and run]
Roger: "My third best polo!" [They run into the sports supply closet, take a minute to catch their breath, and Lori turns off the water. Carol and Roger step outside, Roger looks at his shirt] "Can't salvage this one."
Lori: "Towels! Come on, guys. Seniors!" [Carol and Roger are starting to get fed up with this] "I think it's time for a little midnight snack." [Takes out a snack] "Kale puffs?" [Carol and Roger like this] "Okay now smile big. Seniors!" [Suddenly there's a honking sound, and the group finds themselves surrounded by a flock of geese] "Ditch the puffs!"
[The seniors make a run for it and the geese fight over the kale puffs. Lori takes a selfie of them running away] "Midnight goose run. Football field antics. Best senior year ever. And post."
They stop and Carol and Roger catch their breath]
[The next day at school, Carol and Roger are still burned out. But Lori isn't, and enthusiastically runs up to them]
Lori: "Morning guys. Man, we did such a great job making senior year memories yesterday."
Carol: "Yeah, totally. So, can we be done with this now?"
Lori: "What? No way, I just scored us an invite to Tad's lakehouse party tonight."
Roger: "But, we're going mini-golfing tonight. Remember?"
Lori: "Guys, we can mini-golf any time for the rest of our lives, a lake party is the most important right of passage of all, we have to go."
[Carol and Roger look at each other]
Roger: "Running out of polos but, okay."
Lori: [Squeals] "This is going to be so great." [Excitedly runs off]
[That night, they pull up to the lakehouse. Carol and Roger get out of the car, and Lori run inside super pumped]
Lori: "Woohoo!" [Lori bursts the door open] "Seniors in the house!" [They enter] "Hi everybody. Hi guys. Hey. Ooh, I love this song, I should totally challenge someone to a dance-off." [Looks around] "Umm, maybe... That guy!" [Points to a guy who has control of the floor. Lori runs up to him] "Dance challenge, bro. Carol can I get a video post."
[Breaks out her best albeit slightly awkward moves and ends up spinning out of control and crashing into the fridge]
Carol: "Do you want me to post this?"
Lori: "Uh, no, you could delete that."
[Later, everyone is sitting around a fire]
Truth or Dare Teen: "Okay Lori, truth or dare?"
Truth or Dare Teen: "I dare you..." [Hands Lori some scissors] "to cut off a chunk of your hair."
[Lori looks at Carol and Roger and nervously takes the scissors. She takes a selfie of herself actually cutting off her hair]
Lori: "Haircut hijinks. Best senior year ever."
[Next, Lori, Carol and Roger are taking a hot pepper challenge]
Crowd: "Peppers! Peppers!"
Lori: "Bottoms up guys. Seniors!"
Carol & Roger: [Less enthusiastic] "Seniors."
[They each eat a whole pepper. Carol and Lori breathe fire and Roger's head turns all the way around. The very dazed Lori takes a selfie with her friends before they pass out]
Lori: "Pepper problem. Best senior year ever."
[Lori posts, and joins her friends on the floor, spilling the peppers everywhere. The crowd cheers]
[Next, Lori, Carol and Roger are at the dock]
Lori: "Dock time! Come on guys, we have to jump in. Such a classic senior moment." [Runs for the edge] "Last one in is a bogey butt!"
Carol: "Lori don't! The lake is so cold."
Roger: "You'll freeze your butt off! Come on! All these senior moments are getting to be too much."
Lori: "Too much? I don't get it, I thought you guys were having a good time."
Carol: [Sighs] "I'm sorry Lori, we really tried, but this stuff just isn't us."
Roger: "Yeah, I wanna leave, this is my last polo."
Carol: "You coming, Lori?"
Lori: [Slightly disappointed] "No, I'll get a ride from my mom later, you guys might be okay with giving up on the best senior year ever, but, I'm not."
Roger: [As he and Carol leave] "Well, you know where we'll be if you change your mind."
[Lori watches her friends leave, takes out her phone and sighs. She puts her phone down]
Lori: "Seniors!" [She jumps in, and immediately pops out of the freezing cold water] "My g-g-g-g-gosh." [Takes a selfie] "Lake party. Making a splash. Best senior year ever."
[Suddenly there's a biting sound, Lori lifts her foot and sees a turtle eating it. Lori freaks out]
[Later, Lori is prepared to leave. She takes out her phone and looks through her posts, she sighs]
Tad: [Walks up to Lori with his guitar] "Looks like someone could use a little song." [Starts playing] "♫Well, I'm-♫"
Lori: [Shoves him away] "Not the time, Tad!" [She walks away from him, and makes a call] "Hi, Mom." [Later, she is sitting on the front step with her mom] "I blew it, I did high school totally wrong, there's all these rights of passage I hadn't done, so I tried to cram them in at the last minute, but, they went terribly wrong. Now I'm gonna look back on high school, and have all these regrets."
Rita: "Oh don't worry about it hon, you won't."
Lori: [Sighs] "How do you know?"
Rita: "Well, I didn't do any of the big high school rights of passage either, but my friends and I, we still had a blast. Everyone's high school experience is different, there's no one right way to do it."
Lori: [Sniffles] "Yeah, I guess my friends and I have had a lot of fun together." [Wipes a tear] "Oh, Mom."
Rita: "Oh, sweetie." [They walk to the van, and Rita notices something about Lori] "Did you do something with your hair?"
Lori: "Long story."
[Later, Rita drops Lori off at 'Hole in One-derland'. Carol and Roger are golfing when...]
Lori: [Offscreen] "Psst."
[They look and see Lori approaching them]
Carol: "Hey, Lori, surprised to see you here."
Lori: "Guys, I owe you an apology, I'm sorry I made us do all that stereotypical high school stuff."
Roger: "It was kind of fun at first, but then..."
Lori: "I know, I took it too far. I just so obsessed with this idea of the stuff I had to do before high school was over, but I realize now that those things aren't what matter, it's you guys and doing stuff like this."
Carol & Roger: "We couldn't agree more."
All three: "Seniors!"
Roger: "Come on, grab a club."
[Carol takes a shot, Roger putts his past Carol's club, and Lori bounces hers over both their clubs. All three go into the hole]
Carol: "O, M, gosh, three holes in one."
Roger: "Now that's worth posting."
[They take a selfie]
Lori: "Golfing greats. BFFs. Best senior year ever." [Suddenly a goose steals her phone] "My phone!"
Carol: [Looks at her own phone] "It's okay, it posted."
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