The Loud House Encyclopedia
The Loud House Encyclopedia

The following is a transcript for the episode "Ship Wreckers."

Script[]

Paramount Skydance Corporation Logo The quotations in the following transcript are owned by Paramount and are an exception to The Loud House Encyclopedia's CC-BY-SA license. This transcript is provided in full as a source of review and reference, which likely falls under fair use.

WARNING: This is an episode that premiered in a country other than the US, so if you don't want to be spoiled, we advise you not to read the script. If you do, it's your risk.

[The Loud House. Lincoln whistles as he comes out of his room to take a shower. But as he passes Lisa and Lily's room, there's an explosion which startles him. Lincoln yelps as Todd's head hits the wall above him.]
Todd: "OW. OW. OW. OW."
[As Todd's head falls down the stairs, Lisa runs after it and chases it to the bottom of the stairs, not noticing there's a seagull roosting on the banister.]
Lisa: "See, smarty-circuits?" [picks up Todd's head] "I warned you not to box with Mr. Titanium Alloy Arms." [The seagull caws, but Lisa acts casually at first.] "And a pleasant good morning to you as well." [to Todd's head] "Now, Todd, next time I--" [gasps as she realizes the seagull's presence is rather unusual] "There's a seagull in our residence."
[The seagull defecates on Todd's head, to Lisa's disgust.]
Todd: "I NOTICED."
Lisa: [revolted] "Ugh."
[The seagull flies over to an anchor hanging from the ceiling with some flags and hearts. The scene pans out and reveals Leni and Luna are decorating the living room with fishnets and life rings. Luna is wearing a scuba helmet while Leni is wearing a mask, flippers, and a snorkel. Lisa walks over, and her sisters glance at her. She screams and tosses Todd's head behind her.]
Todd: "OW."
Lisa: "What in the name of Jacques Cousteau is happening in here?"
Leni: "We're giving the room a boat-chic makeover! It's for our viewing party we're hosting tomorrow."
Luna: [takes off her helmet] "We're gonna watch The Dream Boat season finale with Sam and Gavin."
Leni: "Rumor has it, there's going to be a tidal wave of emotion!"
Luna: "And an actual tidal wave of water!"
Lisa: [confused] "Wouldn't it be simpler to just host your nautical soirée on an actual sea vessel?"
Luna: [sarcastically] "Yeah, Lis, lemme call all the people we know who own a boat." [pretends to take out her phone] "Ah, boop-boop-boop-boop-boop." [into her imaginary phone] "Hi, nobody? Do you have a boat we can use? No? Cool. Thanks anyway." [pretends to hang up] "Click." [glares at Lisa]
Lisa: [groans; annoyed] "You can't think of anyone, ladies? Because the answer is staring you in the face."
[Leni and Luna glance back, and the scene pans to a picture of Cliff, wet and annoyed in the bathtub. There's even a toy sailboat.]
Leni: "But how does Cliff drive his boat with those teeny-tiny paws?"
Luna: [realizes what Lisa meant] "Dude!" [The screen pans out, revealing the photo right next to that one: It's Leonard and his boat.] "Gramps has his own ship! How did we blank on that?"
Leni: "And nothing says boaty like a boat! Let's call him and ask!"
[She tries to run off, but she trips in her rubber flippers and tumbles over Luna and Lisa. The seagull flies onto Leni's flipper and strains as it prepares to defecate on them.]
Leni, Luna, and Lisa: [frantically] "No, no, no, no, no, no!"


[The scene cuts to the lake the next day, where Leonard is setting up a TV on the deck of his boat.]
Leonard: "And there are extra blankets in case it gets chilly, and a harpoon in case of a giant squid attack. Any questions?"
Leni: [She and Luna approach him.] "Um, yeah, kind of a biggie: Where did you get those fierce boots?!" [Leonard is shown wearing disco boots.]
Leonard: "On the internet." [groans] "I'm just no good at online shopping. I wanted deck boots, but hit 'disco boots' by mistake." [realizes] "Wait, you think they're fierce? I was gonna return 'em, but on second thought..." [He twirls around and dips himself, and he dances, scatting.]
Leni: "Way to work it, Gramps!"
Leonard: "Oh, and one more thing: If you can do me a favor and keep your shindig to just the four of you." [chuckles] "I was a young sturgeon once. I know how rowdy a bunch of teens can get. And, well, my boat here, she's my lady on the water." [tears up] "We've been through a lot together, I...just don't want..." [He cries and hugs the boat.] "...anything to happen to the old gal!" [cries]
Luna: [She mops his tear puddle.] "Aww, don't worry, Gramps. We'll make sure your lady gets nothing but respect." [salutes] "We promise."
Leonard: "Aww, thanks, my little minnows, I really appreciate it. Okay, guess I'll be shovin' off. Any chance I can get some fierce exit music?" [Leni takes out her phone and plays some disco music, and Gramps begins dancing as he leaves.] "Oh, heh-heh, hey!" [He scats and dances away.]


[Later, Leni and Luna are watching The Dream Boat season finale episode with Gavin and Sam.]
Demi: "Wow, Dax, I actually believed you were into me, but the whole time you've just been using me so you could spend more time..." [tears up] "...at the endless popcorn shrimp buffet?!"
[The TV scene pans to Dax, who is holding a plate full of popcorn shrimp next to the shrimp holder. He smiles sheepishly, showing popcorn shrimp for teeth. Leni, Gavin, Luna, and Sam gasp.]
Sam: "Guys! I so did not see that twist coming!"
Spencer: [offscreen] "Hey!" [The scene cuts to him, delivering pizza for them.] "Anybody order some hot 'za?"
Gavin: "Spencer! My man! We were starting to worry you wouldn't show!"
Spencer: "My bad. All these docks look alike." [He walks onto the dock and onto the ship, but then he notices the TV.] "Whoa, The Dream Boat finale?! Permission to come aboard?"
Luna: "Sorry, dude. We're not supposed to have anyone else on the boat."
Spencer: "Aww, total bummer. Guess now there's nobody to help me eat all the extra garlic knots Gus gave me at work."
[He points down to a delivery truck for Gus' Games and Grub, and the bed of the truck is packed with garlic knots. The camera zooms in, and they shine heavenly. Luna, Sam, Leni, and Gavin stare in awe and drool in hunger.]
Leni: "Those look so tasty."
Luna: "Okay, hear me out: When Gramps said nobody else could come onboard, it was 'cause he was worried about things getting rowdy, right?" [She grabs a yearbook and opens it.] "Well, Spence here was voted 'Most Subdued Dude' in our class!"
Leni: "So it won't be a prob at all." [salutes to Spencer] "Welcome aboard, first mate Spencer."
Spencer: "Yeah!" [But as he hurries up to the boat, he trips on the ramp and the pizzas splatter everywhere.]
Luna: [dismayed] "I forgot, he was also voted 'Most Uncoordinated'."
[A pizza slides down the screen as the transition.]


[Leni and Luna are trying to clean the pizza splatter off the door using paddles.]
Luna: "I'm wishin' now we hadn't splurged on the triple toppings." [to Sam, Gavin, and Spencer] "Yo! What's the latest on the show? Has anyone spotted the tidal wave of water yet?" [There's no answer.] "Helloooo?" [Luna walks over to the ship's front, and she is alarmed.] "Hey!" [Gavin, Sam, and Spencer are still watching the show, but now they are joined by Parker, Roger, and one of Spencer's football teammates.]
Demi: "Oh, how could you?!"
Luna: "What are you guys doing here?!"
Parker: "We saw Spencer's post on SwiftyPic about a cool Dream Boat viewing party on a boat! It sounded way meta!"
Leni: [hurries over] "It's not a party! Gavin! Why didn't you try and stop them?!"
Gavin: [occupied by the movie] "Sorry, I got distracted. Demi's about to pick who gets the last seat on the lifeboat before the tidal wave hits!"
Demi: "Devin!"
[Demi reveals the life jacket, and it cuts to Dax, Devin, and a third guy. A spotlight shines on Devin.]
Devin: "Yeah!"
[Everyone is excited.]
Parker: "I told you she'd pick Devin!"
[Parker and Roger body slam, but Roger is flung backwards into the harpoon. It is launched toward the seagull, which is standing on a treasure chest filled with ice and soda cans, chugging a soda with the can in its beak. The harpoon chunks the chest, startling the seagull.]
Luna: "Guys! Be careful!"
Gavin, Sam, Spencer, Parker, and Spencer's friend: [The tidal wave of water is shown on the TV, and they're chanting.] "Tidal wave! Tidal wave!" [An engine is heard.]
Scoots: [She rolls up on her jet ski.] "Which one?! Emotion or water?!"
Spencer: "The water!"
Scoots: "Ooh, Mama wanna see that drama! Scootsie comin' aboard!" [She hydroplanes toward the boat.]
Leni: [frantic] "SCOOTS! NO!"
Luna: "DON'T DO IT!"
[Scoots launches off a buoy to Leni and Luna's horror, but she doesn't go high enough.]
Scoots: "Yep, never gonna make it." [She hops off her jet ski in midair and dives into the water, saving herself by inflating a lifejacket. But her jet ski crashes into the boat, breaking a hole in the hull.]
Leni and Luna: [horrified] "AHHH!"
Leni: "This is totes beyond the worst!"
Spencer: "Right?" [The screen pans to him and the others, who are all disappointed.] "Gah, they call that a tidal wave? I've seen bigger waves in my bathtub!" [He, his teammate, Parker, and Roger leave, groaning.]
[A tidal wave splashes as the screen transition.]


[The camera shows the hole in the boat, then it pans up to Leni, Luna, Sam, and Gavin. Leni and Luna are stressed out, knowing they've broken their promise to Gramps.]
Sam: "Yikes. If that's not patched, the ship's gonna take on water, and I think we all know what that means."
[Gavin whistles in a descending tone, imitates an explosion, pretends to scream, and makes pretend drowning noises. Sam is stunned while Leni and Luna are horrified. He chuckles nervously.]
Leni: "You guys, the lady is everything to Gramps. What's he gonna say when he sees this ginormous hole?"
Luna: "Nothing..." [The camera zooms in on her dramatically] "Because he isn't gonna know about it. We have to find a way to fix the boat ourselves. Something that's super easy and doesn't cost a ton of moolah."
Leni: [She gasps and her eyes sparkle.] "This is exactly the kind of thing the internet is for!" [grabs her phone] "Hey phone, play the most viewed do-it-yourself boat repair video."
[Her phone brings it up. It's a guy with a ship which has a hole.]
Guy: "What's up, fixer-uppers, I'm Guy the DIY Guy! Today, I'm gonna show you how to patch a hole in your hull in just three easy steps! Let's dive right in! Not literally. Step 1: Staple a layer of chicken wire over the hole." [Luna is following Guy's steps, dangling from a rope and stapling chicken wire over the hole. She gives her friends a thumbs-up, and they do so in response, but they let go of the rope and Luna falls into the lake. Leni grabs the rope and pulls Luna out, with an octopus clutching her boot. She screams and shakes it off.] "Step 2: Mix a gluey plaster and use it to cover the wire." [Luna is shown doing this as well. But she gets her paddle stuck to the glue. She pulls hard, and it comes off, but it flings her into the water again. Leni, Gavin, and Sam pull her out, but now the octopus is clutching Luna's face. She pries it away from her, and it dives back into the lake.] "Step 3: Nail some new planks of wood over your patch job, and voila, your ship is shipshape!" [Luna nails new planks over the hole. She gives a thumbs-up to the others, and even down to the octopus. In response, the octopus gives Luna seven thumbs-ups using its tentacles.]


[Back at home, Leni and Luna are pleased, and they take a seat on the couch.]
Luna: "I can't believe we pulled that off!"
Leni: "I know! And Gramps won't ever have to know what happened to his lady."
Luna: "Can you even begin to imagine life without internet videos?"
Leni: [screams] "Sorry." [Her eyes shrivel] "I began to imagine." [Her phone dings, and she checks it.] "Ooh, ooh! Guy the DIY Guy just released a new video."
Luna: "Wait, you actually subscribed to his channel?"
Leni: "Um, after he helped us? Of course I did. It's proper internet etiquette." [She plays the new video.]
Guy: [sheepishly] "Okay, so bad news, fixer-uppers: Uh, my boat patching system--uh, how do I put this... Uh, it's got a few holes in it. For real, it doesn't work. Huh, wow, wish I tested it first." [He pans his camera to his boat, which is sinking. Leni and Luna are shocked that they did all that work for nothing.]
Luna: "Guy the DIY Guy is a fraud! Which means our patch won't hold! Which means if Gramps takes his boat out..."
Leni: "He's totes going to..." [She imitates the boat sinking, which frightens Luna.] "We gotta warn him! Though, first..." [takes out her phone] "Unsubscribe." [She calls Gramps, but it goes to voicemail.]
Leonard's Voicemail: "You've netted Leonard's voicemail. I can't come to the phone right now. The lady and I are about to head out for some deep-sea fishing." [Leni and Luna's eyes shrivel in fear.] "I'm talking way, way out, in the deepest waters you can think of." [beep]
[Leni and Luna scream and run off to find Leonard.]


[They run toward the dock, but the boat is not there.]
Luna: "Gramps already headed out to sea!"
Leni: "There has to be something we can do before it's too late!"
[Suddenly, they look down into the water and notice one of Leonard's disco boots.]
Luna: "That's one of his fierce disco boots!" [Luna grabs it and pulls it out, and the two sister believe the worst.] "Leni, the lady sunk and took Gramps down with her!" [voice breaking] "We won't ever see Gramps again!"
[Leni and Luna tear up and hug each other, sobbing. But then...]
Leonard: [offscreen] "Suffering seaweed! What in the heck are you two blubbering about?"
Leni: [cries] "Great, now Ghost Gramps is gonna haunt us forever!"
Luna: "No, Leni, that's actual Gramps!"
[Leni gasps as Leonard rows up to the dock in a canoe, safe and sound. As soon as he stops, his granddaughters jump in and hug him tightly.]
Leni: "You're alive!"
Leonard: "Why wouldn't I be?" [Leni and Luna release him and frown, knowing they have to own up.]
Leni: "Because we thought we sank your lady."
Leonard: [confused] "Huh?"
Luna: [ashamed] "We let other people on the boat."
Leonard: "WHAT?!" [He jumps out of the canoe, and he scares some nearby seagulls.] "That's the one thing I asked you kids not to do!" [He gets angry.] "Did you have seaweed in your ears?!"
Luna: "I know, and you were right. Things got out of hand, and the boat got busted."
Leni: "So we came to warn you you'd sink if you went out to sea." [realizes] "Wait, why are you here and not out at sea?"
Leonard: "I'm trying to find my ding-dang disco boots." [He reveals that his boots are not on his feet.] "Before I set out, I was doing cartwheels and they both flew off the dock!" [Cut to earlier: Leonard is doing cartwheels when his boots fly off his feet and land in the water. Cut back to the present.]
Luna: "So you never even left the dock? Where's your boat?"
Leonard: "Right over there." [He points to his boat, which is docked at a similar dock just nearby.]
Luna: "Man, Spencer was right. All these docks do look alike." [to Gramps] "So, you think you can ever forgive us, Gramps?"
Leni: [gives manatee eyes] "We're really sorry. We'll never do it again."
[Leni and Luna give manatee eyes to Leonard.]
Leni and Luna: "Please?"
Leonard: "Aww, how can I resist the old manatee eyes?" [hugs his minnows] "Of course I forgive ya! But you gotta do two things for me. First, help me fix the lady."
Luna: [salutes] "We're in! What's the second thing?"
Leonard: "Help me find my disco boots."
Luna: "Here's one!" [She pulls out the boot.]
Leonard: "Great!" [puts it on] "One down, one to go! Now, how's about some fierce rowing music while we look?"
[Luna takes out her phone and puts on disco music, and Leni jams to it as Leonard rows.]
Leonard: [kicks] "Pow!"
Leni and Luna: "Go, Gramps!"
[As Leonard rows away, the octopus pokes its head out from the water, and it lifts its tentacle to reveal Leonard's other disco boot. It shakes its tentacle to the music, and the episode ends.]


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