The following is a transcript for the episode "Snow Bored".
Script[]
The quotations in the following transcript are owned by Paramount and are an exception to The Loud House Encyclopedia's CC-BY-SA license. This transcript is provided in full as a source of review and reference, which likely falls under fair use.
[It is nighttime, and snow is falling. Inside, the siblings are watching the television news.] Katherine Mulligan: "Good evening, everybody. Now stay warm and stay tuned. Because we'll have tonight's weather right after this." Lucy:[wishing] "Oh, spirit in the sky, grant my wish." Lori:[her fingers are crossed] "Fingers crossed." Luan:[her arms and legs are crossed.] "Everything crossed." [Lily drinks milk from her bottle, burps and laughs.] Lola: "I got my lucky rabbit's foot." Lana: "I got my lucky booger. This baby got me through preschool." Lynn: "And I got my lucky jock" [stretches it, slinging it into Lincoln's face.] Lincoln: "Ugh!" [to the viewers] "You may be wondering what the heck is going on here. I'll show ya'." [opens the front door and steps outside.] "See that? Snow, beautiful snow. And if it keeps coming down, we can be in for a snow day tomorrow. So tonight, we're doing everything in our power to make it happen." Luna: "Dudes! The weather's on!" [Lincoln runs back in and cross his fingers.] Patchy Drizzle: "Patchy Drizzle here. Takin' on the weather, myself. Rollin' up my sleeves" [rolling his sleeves up] "Takin' it on." [The Loud kids watch it seriously.] Patchy Drizzle: "Better put on the old snowshoes, folks, 'cause we could be getting up to twenty four inches of Mother Nature's dandruff. I regret saying that." [takes a piece of paper] "Ahem. The following schools will be closed tomorrow." The Loud kids:[hopeful] "Royal Woods! Royal Woods! Royal Woods!" Patchy Drizzle: "Beaverton, Hazeltucky, Huntington Oaks and..." [The kids look on in awe.] Patchy Drizzle: "...that's it." The Loud kids:[sad] "Awwww..." Lola:[angrily] "WHY YOU LOUSY-!!" Patchy Drizzle: "I'm just kidding. You too, Royal Woods!" [Aerial view of the house and the whole neighborhood; the kids start cheering and jumping up and down.] The Loud kids:[excited] "HOORAY!!! WOO HOO!!! Snow Day!! Snow Day!! Snow Day!!" Patchy Drizzle: "Snow Day!!" [Lisa appears and turns off the TV.] Lisa: "This just in. There will not be a snow day tomorrow." [Her siblings are surprised and stop cheering.] Lisa: "Once I spray my super strength salt across the city roadways, we shall have no trouble accessing school." [They all boo at Lisa and throw pillows at her.] Lola:[angrily] "WHY WOULD YOU RUIN OUR SNOW DAY?!" Lisa: "Ah-ah-em." [pulls a chart down] "For every school day you miss, your brain functionality decreases by approximately .0006%." Leni: "But Lisa, snow days are F-O-N, fun!" Lisa:[presses a button and the chart goes up.] "I rest my case. Besides, I fail to see how frolicking in frigid temperatures like a bunch of nincompoops is fun." Lincoln: "What if we could show you how fun snow days can be? Then would you call off the salt?" [The Loud kids excitedly clamour over each other in agreement.] Luna: "That's a great idea, bro!" Leni: "Yeah!" [Chanting] "F-O-N! F-O-N!" The Loud sisters:[Chanting] "F-O-N! F-O-N!" Lisa:[Calls for attention] "Fine!! But only because I can't stand to hear you spell erroneously." [The Loud kids cheer as they walk off.] Leni:[stops walking] "Wait, I thought we were spelling "fun"."
[The next day, everybody is getting out of the house to have fun in the snow. Lisa stops at the top of the doorstep.] Lisa:[Annoyed] "Okay, you've got four hours. Dazzle me or it's back to school for you truants." [puts on her snow goggles.]
[Lincoln runs while pulling Lisa on the sled.] Lincoln: "Woo-hoo! Sledding! What do you think, Lis?" Lisa:[Grumpily] "I think my buttocks are cold." [The sled hits a rock, bouncing Lisa off of it while yelping, landing in the snow on her buttocks.] "And now bruised."
[Lincoln appears with his head peeking out of an igloo.] Lincoln: "Here's another snow day classic. Snow Fort!!! Come on in. You gotta check out the built in cup holders." [crawls back inside] Lisa: "Hmm... lacks crossbeams, load-bearing walls, a solid foundation..." Lincoln: "All choices I made." Lisa: "Hardly up to code." [After Lisa touches the igloo, it falls apart.] Lincoln:[Hurt] "It's collapsible too." [Lana comes] Lana: "How about letting old Lans take the reins?" Lincoln: "Knock yourself out. My buttocks are cold. And bruised."
[Lana made a snowman.] Lana: "Say hello to Mr. Twig Arms!" Lisa: "Huh. So, what does Mr. Twig Arms do?" Lana: "Uh... nothing. But, he's awful jolly." Lisa: Perhaps if you valued your education, you could build something with more pizazz." [presses a button and a robot appears out of the garage, making buzzing noises.] "Say hello to Mr. Reinforced Titanium Alloy Arms." [The robot is searching for a target to destroy. It scans the snowman. It shoots lasers at Mr. Twig Arms, causing it to go red and become destroyed.] Lisa: "Sorry, I forgot he has jolly seeking lasers."
[Lola is ice skating.] Lola: "Here's the returning champion, Lola Loud! About to execute a triple salchow!"[performs her triple salchow and sticks the landing.] "Come on, Lisa! It's your turn!" Lisa:[counting formulas] "Based on water density, air temp, and the weight of a small human, that ice should give way in 3, 2..." [The ice breaks and Lola falls into the water.] Lola: "Dang it." Lisa: "Dang it's right. I was one second off."
[Lisa and Lucy are making snow angels.] Lisa: "What exactly are we doing?" Lucy: "Playing corpsicle. It's my favorite snow game." Lisa: "How do you win? By getting hypothermia?" Lucy: "Yes."
[Luan is holding a bucket full of snow.] Luan: "Watch this, Lis. You're gonna love snow pranks." [The two siblings walk up to Lincoln who is rebuilding his snow fort. Luan winks at Lisa - who is confused - and tips the bucket of snow onto Lincoln's butt.] Luan: "FROST BUTT!!" Lincoln:[panics and shivers] "Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold!" Luan:[laughs] "Oh, man. Classic Luan." Lincoln:[still shivering and running around] "Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold, cold!" Lisa:[researching on her phone] "Uh...as the famous Shackleton expedition has shown us, losing a buttock to frostbite is no laughing matter." Luan: "Eesh, I'd really like to make a crack right now. But, it's snow time to be cheeky." [laughing] "Get it?" Lisa: "Unfortunately, yes." Lincoln:[still shivering] "Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold, cold!"
[Lynn and Lisa are on a bobsled while their siblings watch.] Lynn: "Representing Royal Woods in the World Bobsled Finals, it's Lynn and Lisa Loud!! Oh, yeah!!" [starts the sled on the slope.] Lisa: "Woah, woah, woah... Stop!!!" Lynn:[slips and accidentally lets the sled move away.] "Uh-oh." Lisa: "I can't see this ending well." [Lisa goes really fast. It soon approaches a ramp and takes her up in the air. She screams in panic as the bobsled and her helmet fly off. She falls in deep snow. Her siblings gasp and come to her location.] Lincoln: "Umm.. Snow angels?" Lisa: "It's over, guys. Snow days are both pointless and a health hazard. Ergo, I shall unleash the salt." Lisa's siblings: "NOOOOOOOO!!!"
[Lisa walks home. Her siblings complain as they follow her.] Lincoln: "Aw, come on! Seriously?" Lisa: "My decision is final. You can not talk me out of it." [She is hit on the head by a snowball.] Lisa:[Turns around and angrily clenches her fist] Alright, who did that?" [The Loud kids move away and reveal that it was Lana.] Lana: "Aw, you finks!" Lisa: "You've poked a bear, my friend." Lana: "Haha. What are you going to do..." [Lisa throws a snowball at Lana.] Lisa: "Huh. That was actually quite satisfying." [Lisa makes another snowball.] Lynn:[helping Lana up with Lincoln] "Here, Lana." Lincoln: "Let's help you up." [Lisa throws a snowball at Lana again, and the others as well.] Lisa: "Hey, this is kind of..." Lincoln: "...fun?" Lisa: "Yes, F-O-N, fun." [The Loud kids are having fun with snowballs.]
[Later at nighttime, Lincoln is blowing hot air at his hot cocoa.] Lisa: "Hey, Lincoln. Thanks for today. You made a snow day convert out of me." Lincoln: "Well, I'm glad you had fun. Especially since Patchy said we're going back to school tomorrow." [Lisa gasps in surprise and smiles.]
[The next day, the Loud sisters minus Lisa come into Lincoln's room while he is still sleeping.] Lynn: "Lincoln, wake up! It's a snow day miracle!" Lincoln: "Lynn, what are you talking about?" Lori:[joyful] "Look outside!" [Lincoln looks out the window to see it's another snow day.] Lincoln: "What in the what? How is this even possible?" Lana: "Oh, my lucky booger worked again!" Lisa:[imitates buzzer] "Incorrect. I called some friends at NASA. They pulled a few strings, and a little cloud-seeding later," [Excitedly shakes her fists] "We have ourselves another snow day!" Lincoln: "That is awesome! Thanks, Lisa." Lana: "Aw, I still think it was you, Lucky B." [Kisses her booger]
[Outside, Lincoln is at the top of the hill holding a sled. He adjusts his hat to makes himself comfortable, then takes off.] Lincoln: "YEAH!!!" [Suddenly, snowballs are thrown towards him. Lincoln closes one of his eyes and steers the sled to avoid them, however his sled crashes into a tree. He gets up and holds his sore head until a pile of snow falls onto him.] Lisa: [laughs] "There's nothing like another whole day of lobbing frozen projectiles! WOO HOO!! Snow day!!!"
[Lana is making another snowman.] Lana: "Ah. Even better." [Suddenly, Lisa starts firing snowballs and blows several holes into her new snowman. It now looks like Swiss cheese.] Lana:[gasps] "Mr. Twig Arms Jr.!" Lisa:[laughs] "Look alive, Lana! Mr. Twig Arms sure doesn't! Ha ha!"
[Lynn is riding her bobsled when suddenly Lisa appears on her own one.] Lisa: "Hey, Lynn!" [busts out a snowball Gatling gun] "Say hello to my not-so-little friend." [laughs as she throws snowballs at her sister, forcing her to flinch and shut her eyes. Suddenly she screams as her bobsled is blasted away.] "Snow daaaaaaaaaaaaay! [Lynn and her bobsled falls into Lincoln's newly built igloo, knocking the flag over and forcing Lincoln to flinch.] Lincoln: "Dang it."
[Lisa comes by with a bazooka loaded with snow.] Lisa: "Hey, guys! I want to show you my latest invention: the Ultra Snowzooka! Patent pending." [Looks around] "Guys? Where'd they go?" [The others are inside the house.] Lincoln: "Sheesh! We've created a monster!" Lori: "At least we're safe in here." Lucy: "Yeah. It's not like she can bring snow inside the house." [Lisa shoots snow at them and they yelp at their ambush.] Lisa: "Behold, my latest latest invention! Indoor snow! Patent pending." [Lisa starts shooting snowballs and laughs while her siblings run off terrified.]
[Lori is hiding in her room's closet, talking to Bobby on her tablet.] Lori: "Boo Boo Bear, Lisa is literally... out of control." [pants in fear] Lisa:[opens the door] "On the contrary, I've never felt more in control! Or more alive!" [to Bobby] "She'll have to call you back, Boo Boo Bear." Lori: "I love you." [Lisa shoots Lori with snow, covering the phone's camera, and it shuts off.]
[Lana peeks out of the twins' room and scans the hallways before making a mad dash to the bathroom, desperately holding her bladder. Once she gets in and closes the door, she gets ambushed off-screen by Lisa and sprints out of the bathroom with her overalls down.] Lana:[screams] "IS NOTHING SACRED?!" [Lisa laughs evilly as she chases Lana.]
[Lincoln and Leni are hiding in the fireplace.] Lincoln: "I think we're safe in here." Leni:[holds a bag of chestnuts] "I brought chestnuts for roasting." Lisa:[up the chimney] "YOO HOO! Here's Jack Frost nipping at your nose!" [Lisa shoots snow down the chimney.] Lincoln: "Oh, shoot." [the snow covers him and Leni.]
[Lucy is hiding in the vent.] Lucy: "That maniac will never find me here." Lynn:[Shows up] "Ah! Mind if I join you?" Lucy: "It's pretty crowded up here with me and the spirits. But I think there's room next to Great Grandma Harriet." Lynn:[sits next to her sister] "Phew! Oh, safe at last!" [A giant snowball is rolling towards Lynn and Lucy. They panic and run away from it.] "Move it, Grandma!" [Snow splatters outside the vent as the Wilhelm scream is heard.]
[Later at night, the Loud kids are at the living room and wish to end snow days.] Lucy: "Oh, spirit in the sky. End this madness." Lori:[fingers crossed] "Please, please. No more snow!" Luan:[arms and legs crossed] "Yeah, I can't take another day of this." [Lily drinks milk from her bottle, burps and laughs.] Lola: "How do you reverse a rabbit's foot?!" Lana: "Lucky B, You've gone too far!" Luna: "Dudes! It's on!" Patchy Drizzle: "Well, no one saw this coming but it looks like we're in for another foot of snow tonight! And that's gonna mean..." [The Loud kids gasp.] Patchy Drizzle: "...School closings!!!" [The Loud kids groan sadly.] Lisa: "YESSS!!! Thank you, NASA!!! You punks ready for tomorrow? 'Cause my snow powered tank sure is!" [clicks a button] [Outside, the tank sends more snow.] Lisa's Siblings: "NOOOOO!!!" Lincoln:[Pleading in frustration] "Lisa, please! enough! You have to call off the snow day." Lisa: "Sorry, bub. Cloud-seeding isn't exactly reversible." Lincoln: "Then use your special salt!" Lisa: "But I'm really looking forward to another snow day. You guys convinced me, they are F-O-N, fun!" Lincoln: "I think we've had enough fun." [The sisters clamor over each other begging Lisa to call off the snow day.] Leni: "Please! We gotta go back to school!" Luan: "Bring on the learning!" Lisa: "Well, I'm quite crestfallen. But if that is the consensus, I'll submit to the will of the majority." Leni:[Nervously] "So... going back to school?" [Lisa nods and the sisters cheer.] Leni: "S-K-O-O-L! S-K-O-O-L!" Lincoln: "Thanks, Lis." Lisa: "No problem, Lincoln. Best get ready for bed. School day tomorrow."
[The next morning, Lisa is sitting in her tank, which now shoots the salt.] Lisa:[to the viewers] "Well, Houston, mission accomplished. My master plan was a major success. I'm pretty sure my siblings won't be wanting any more snow days." [rises out of the tank, revealed to be outside the house.] "And now that I've repurposed my snow tank to a salt-spraying, snow-melting de-icer, it's time for some real F-U-N, spelled correctly, I might add." [Lisa makes the tank move forward and spray salt as her siblings follow her.] Lisa's sisters: "School day! School day! School day!" Lincoln:[to the viewers; confused] "Wait. What just happened?"
