The following is a transcript for the episode "The Cling and I".
Script[]
The quotations in the following transcript are owned by Paramount Skydance and are an exception to The Loud House Encyclopedia's CC-BY-SA license. This transcript is provided in full as a source of review and reference, which likely falls under fair use.
[The dining room. Lily is eating cereal for breakfast, but is interrupted by Lana letting out a big burp, causing her to drop her spoon and let some cereal fly.] Lana: "A little treat for Charles." [She puts some bacon under her hat and leaves with Hops in tow.] Lily:[gets an idea] "Lily feed Charles, too." [She pours the rest of her cereal in her pants. Meanwhile, Lisa is eating pancakes when Lily swipes her plate.] "Need this..." [puts the pancakes in her pants] "And this." [She shoves her hand in Lisa's mouth and takes out some chewed pancakes before putting it in her pants. She then walks into the kitchen, her pants so bulky some of her breakfast is leaking on the floor. In the kitchen, Charles is about to eat his dog food when he smells the bacon Lana has and begs for it.] Lana: "Oh, yes, I do have bacon for you." [puts it on Charles's kibble; Charles gets excited] "I told Mom to make it extra crispy, just the way you like it." [Charles eagerly digs in, splattering Lana with kibble.] Lily:[enters] "Lily's turn!" [She takes out a fusion of pancakes, cereal, and bacon from her pants, which Charles notices. As he gets excited, Lily throws the combo food in the air, and Charles jumps up and catches it. Lily claps at the sight.] Lana: "Thanks for helping, Lily." [puts arm around her] "Welp, I'm off to give Vanzilla a much-needed paint job." [twirls paintbrush as she leaves] Lily:[wants to come along] "Lily paint too!" Lana: "Sure, why not?" [The two sisters leave with Charles eating the food spilling from Lily's pants.]
[Lana is painting Vanzilla, spreading teal paint over its cracked exterior. The paint glistens in the sunlight, the metal showing Lana's reflection.] Lana: "Vanzilla, by the time this makeover is done, you're gonna feel like a brand-new woman." [Suddenly, Lily's giggling is heard. Lana turns around and gasps in alarm when she sees Lily painting a crude picture of herself and Lana surrounded by hearts and butterflies, and all in lavender using Vanzilla as her canvas.] Lana:[alarmed] "Lily, what are you doing?!" Lily: "I make picture for you!" Lana:[trying to hide her anger; chuckles] "Great."
[In the backyard, Lana and Hops have finished making a mud castle] Lana: "Ah, a mud masterpiece." Lily: "Lily add roof!" [Lily has brought a rock with her. As Lana gasps in alarm, Lily throws the rock on the castle with effort, destroying all of Lana's efforts and splattering the mud on all three of them.] Lana:[sighs in dismay] "Thanks, Lily..." [Lily giggles at the destruction.]
[The bathroom. Lana is on the toilet, reading a newspaper and humming to herself.] Lily: "I go potty too!" [Lily has indeed brought her training toilet with her to the bathroom, reading a princess storybook and humming to herself in the exact same way as Lana. Cut to the hallways. Lana flushes the toilet.] Lily: "Flush!" [Lana storms out of the bathroom with Lily close behind, but then they run into Rita.] Rita: "Aw, isn't that sweet? Looks like you're Lily's favorite." [giggles] [Lily drops her storybook and hugs Lana, giggling. Lana sighs in dismay.]
[Lily is looking around in the kitchen] Lily:[singsong] "Lana, where are you?" [She leaves the kitchen, unaware that Lana and Hops are hiding in the cupboards. They peek out to see if the coast is clear.] Lana:[sighs] "I love Lily, but being with her all the time is... a lot." [stands up] "Sometimes I just need--" [accidentally hits the top of the cupboard] "Ow." [slumps down] "--space. What do I do?" [Hops thinks about it, snaps his "fingers", and croaks a suggestion] Lana: "That's a great idea. We just need to find someone else for Lily to play with. But for now, we hide in this cupboard until it's past Lily's bedtime." [Hops nods in agreement, and they high-five with his tongue.]
[The next day, early morning. Lana heads downstairs with Hops on her head and Lily clinging onto her left leg.] Lily: "Want to catch bugs? Eat mud pies? Feed Charles?" Leni: "Sorry!" [rushes past them and knocks them over] "In a hurry to get to the mall. They're running a special deal of free bucket with a purchase of any bucket hat!" Lana:[gets an idea] "Ooh!" [gasps; to Lily] "Don't they have that choo-choo train at the mall?" [elbows Lily] "That sounds like fun, right, Lily?" Lily:[shakes head no] "Mm-mm." [goes wide-eyed and hugs Lana] "Lily play with Lana!" Lana:[tries to shake Lily off] "You have a blast!" [shakes her off as she lands in Leni's arms] Leni:[gasps] "Yay! Shopping buddy." [Leni leaves with a whining Lily in tow.] Lana: "That was easy." [chuckles]
[Later, Lana is giving Charles a bath in an inflatable swimming pool. Charles groans.] Lana: "I know, boy, but if I have to bathe once a week, so do you." [Suddenly Lily zooms by in a shopping cart, laughing as she knocks over Lana into the pool. Charles runs away from the commotion.] Lily: "Fun!" [The cart stops in front of Lana as Lily giggles.] Lana: "How are you back?! Where's Leni?" [Lily laughs slyly. Cut to a flashback of Leni and Lily at Reininger's.] Leni: "Lily, which one looks better on me? The bucket hat?" [Lily isn't impressed] "Or the bucket?" [wears an actual bucket on her head] [Lily groans. She then sees Renee's mom pass by with a shopping cart and follows her. Leni is then alerted by Lily's giggling.] Leni: "Lily?!" [Lily rides off in Renee's mom's shopping cart with Renee's mom in pursuit. Leni tries to follow them, but the bucket slips over her eyes and she runs into a wall, groaning as she tries to find her balance. Back to the present.] Lily: "Lily play bath time too!" [dives into the pool] [When the soap clears, Lily is hugging an uncomfortable Lana, who groans.]
[Lynn is about to play badminton when Lana shows up with Lily.] Lana: "Oooh! Badminton! You love to hit stuff! This'll be fun!" Lynn:[hands Lily a racquet] "Let’s do this, Lily. Loser does the other one's chores for a year." [Lily gives a worried look while Lana waves as they walk away.] Lana: "I’ll watch the whole time." [Once Lynn and Lily are out of sight, Lana dashes away, crawling under a bush, jumping over a fence and climbing up a tree all the way to the top.] Lana: "Phew! Finally lost her." [Lily pops up on top of the tree right in front of her.] Lily:[giggles] "That fun! Again!" [Lana groans once again as Lily giggles.]
[The next morning, Lana wakes up and yawns, only to flinch as soon as she hears Lily incoming.] Lily:[singsong] "Lana, where are you?" [Lana gasps and hides under her covers, pretending to sleep. Hops follows suit by hiding under the sand in his tank.] Lily:[climbs on Lana's bed] "Lana! Lana!" [tries to open one of Lana's eyes before outright yelling in her ear] "LANA!" [Lana still doesn't stir, so Lily bounces on Lana's bed.] "Time to play!" [Lana still doesn't respond and just snores. Lily sighs in disappointment.] Lola:[playing tea party] "You can play tea party with me while you're waiting." [sips tea] "Mr. Sprinkles has an available plus one." [taps the seat next to him; whispers] "He got stood up." [Lily agrees and hops off Lana's bed before heading to Lola's tea party. Lana senses this and takes a peek, but when Lily notices, Lana resumes snoring. Lily shrugs and joins Lola at her tea party. Hops also notices.] Lola: "I'm sure you'll be more careful with your teacup than Butter-Hooves over here." [gestures to Eunice with a spilled teacup on the ground; Lily laughs] "OK, so hold your teacup like so." [Lola extends her pinky while holding her teacup and takes a sip. Lily extends a pinky, holds her teacup, and takes a sip, liking the taste.] [Noticing what's going on, Lana wakes up and turns to Hops.] Lana: "Psst." [points outside] "Shh." [Hops gives a thumbs-up in agreement. While Lily is still drinking tea, a fully-dressed Lana sneaks over to the door with Hops in tow and then crawls on top of the door and out of the room.] Lana: "Yes! We did it!" [does a victory dance and high-fives Hops] "FREEDOM!" [They leave]
[Lana and Hops are out in the backyard. Lana is playing with a paddleball with Hops sitting on it as the ball bounces. She then hears Lily giggling and looks behind her.] Lana: "Huh?" [Lola and Lily are ribbon dancing side-by-side] Lola: "And rainbow. And river. And rainbow. And ri--" [Lily succeeds the first time, but while doing it a second time, she ends up wrapping both herself and Lola together in her ribbon. The two look at each other and laugh. Lana begins to frown and grumble at this.]
[Later, Lana is polishing off Vanzilla when suddenly, Lola and Lily come in driving around in Lola's jeep.] Lily: "WOOHOO! This is fun, Lola! Faster!" Lana: "Oh, come on, Lily." [Rolls her eyes] "It's not that fun." [Lana frowns again and folds her arms, seeming a little jealous]
[That night, Lana is about to go to bed when Lily shows up with her storybook] Lily: "Time for my bedtime story!" Lana:[thinking she means her] "OK, fine..." [saves space for Lily in her bed, but Lily toddles right past her...] "Huh?" [...and towards Lola's bed] Lola: "Ooh, it's about princesses like us!" [giggles] Lily: "Psst." [whispers] "You're my favorite." [Touched, Lola puts her tiara on Lily, and the two hug. Now Lana is clearly jealous] Lana:[gasps] "I don't wanna interrupt your little love-fest, so I'll just go sleep on the couch." [storms off with her pillow] Lola:[notices] "Did you hear something?" Lily: "Mm-mm." [They resume hugging. Meanwhile, as Lana heads to the stairs, Hops stops her and croaks in protest.] Lana:[denying] "There's nothing wrong with me, Hops." [Hops croaks again] "Fine. I'm upset that I'm not Lily's favorite anymore." [Hops croaks] "But don't worry. We're gonna fix this."
[The next day, Lily is wearing a lavender dress and a crown and on the top of the stairs when Lana shows up] Lana: "Lily, Hops and I were just about to dig into this tasty mud pie." [takes out the mud pie] "Wanna join us? The worms are still fresh and wriggly." Lily:[shakes her head no] "Lily play grand entrance with Lola." [Just then Lola shows up and shoves Lana out of the way, holding a brush as a microphone.] Lola: "Presenting, Princess Lily Loud!" [A spotlight shines on Lily as she hops down the stairs, blowing kisses to the imaginary watchers.] "This royal is rocking a stunning ensemble that can go from playtime to bedtime."
[Later, Lily and Lola are having a tea party. Lola is sipping tea while Lily eats a cupcake. Lana walks in holding a pillow under each arm] Lana: "C'mon, Little sis. Let's play pillow fort." [Lily looks surprised] Lana: "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean you, Lily. I was talking to Lisa." [Lisa comes holding a large stack of pillows] Lisa:[groans] "I can't think of a fortress less structurally sounding than one made from feather pillows" Lana:[nudges her] "Play along." Lisa:[drops the pillows; pretending] "I mean, what a thrill to accompany you on this architectural endeavor." [Lana smiles while Lisa gives a very bored expression.]
[Later, Lana puts the final touch on their pillow fort while Lisa measures it. But Lily is still sipping tea, she notices some tea on her upper lip but she and Lola just laugh] Lana:[Forced laughter] "Ha, ha, ha. Good one, Lisa." Lisa:[Stops measuring] "Wha? I didn't say anythi-" [Lana stuffs a pillow in Lisa's mouth. Meanwhile, Lola wipes Lily's upper lip. Lana then gets another idea] Lana: "Pillow fight!" [Heaves a pillow at Lisa, sending her crashing into the wall] Lisa:[Cross] "Hey! That wasn't part of our deal. Now you have to be my test subject or two weeks." Lana: "Fine." [Wails on Lisa with her pillow while fake laughing] "Lisa and I are having so much fun." [Lily is more interested in tea and cookies. Lana hits Lisa even harder, accidentally knocking a pillow out of place in the fort, causing it to drop on Lana. Lana pops out of the pile with a pillow in her mouth] Lisa: "I will see you Monday for our first experiment, and remember, don't wear anything flammable." [Lana groans]
[Later, in the backyard, Lana unrolls the blueprints for a castle] Lana: "There's no way Lily can resist playing with me in her very own castle." [A few planks of wood and saw buzzes later and Lily is wearing a blindfold and being led out to the backyard by Lana. Lana takes the blindfold off] "Tada!" [Lily loves the castle] "I filled it with your favourite snacks, toys and bean bag chairs." Lily:[Hugs it] "Best thing ever!" [Runs off] "Lola look!" [Brings Lola] "We play princess." Lola:[Sees the castle and also loves it] "Ooh, I've been in the market for one of these, you would not believe how few castles there are in a place called Royal Woods." [They go inside the castle then close the door behind them, leaving Lana and Hops to just crash into the door. Lily pokes her head out] Lily: "Forgot something." [Lana gasps, thinking Lily means her. She tries to enter but Lily closes the door and she crashes into it again, but Lily just ignores her and walks off] "The tea." [Lana is in complete disbelief at this, and a little hurt, but then she sees the closed door and, knowing her competition is the only one inside] Lana: "Sorry, Lola. but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do." [With that, Lana boards up the door from the outside and goes after Lily]
[Back inside the Loud House, Lily has grabbed the tea set from the coffee table when Lana shows up] Lana:[lying] "Lily, I have bad news for ya. Lola said she has a pageant emergency and had to leave." [Lily is skeptical and raises an eyebrow] "But that means we can now play together!" [grabs the tea set and throws it away] "Who's ready for some couch cushion diving?" [dives into the couch and comes out munching on some chips] "Ooh. Mm. This potato chip isn't even that stale." [swallows] Lily:[considers] "Hmm..." [Suddenly she hears a clown horn honking as Luan comes down the stairs in clown makeup and riding her unicycle, juggling balls before going into the kitchen.] Lily:[interested] "Ah! Lily want to play clown!" [follows Luan] [Lana crosses her arms and slumps in defeat.]
[Scene fades to Lana sitting under the kitchen counter again with Hops, this time looking very depressed. Rita opens up the cabinet door.] Rita: "Lana! What are you doing hiding in here? It's not bath day." Lana:[voice breaking] "I'm not hiding, I'm sulking! There's a difference! I was Lily's favorite, but I pushed her away! [turns away and curls up on her side] And now I'm afraid we'll never be close again." Rita:[sympathetically] "Of course you will, sweetie. Lily goes through phases where she has different favorites." Lana:[cheering up] "Really?" [Lana comes out of the cabinet] Rita: "Yeah, don't you remember last month, she went through that Luna phase and was calling everybody 'dude'? I'm sure you'll be her favorite again soon." [Lana feels better and hugs Rita's legs as Hops starts to hug hers.] Lana: "Thanks, Mom." Rita:[smiles and hugs her back] "Sure honey." [breaks up the hug and goes to the cabinet] "Now scootch because I need the first-aid kit. Luan fell off her unicycle." Luan:[off-screen] "Mom! Can you hurry? I'm wheel-ly hurt! Get it?" [laughs] [Rita doesn't seem amused by the joke and heads out of the kitchen with the first-aid kit in hand, leaving both Lana and Hops alone.] Lana: "You hear that, Hops? Lily will want to play with me again! I'm gonna start a list of fun things we'll do together when she's ready!" [immediately gets an idea] "Ooh! You think she'll want to go garbage sledding with me in the dump?" [walks off] "Hops, write that down." [Hops takes out a pen and paper and does so.]
[Later that night, Lana is in bed with Hops writing down notes on the paper, which is now a long list] Lana: "...then we'll go to the arcade. "Ooh! And then we could pick each other's noses!" [Hops questionably croaks] Lana: "OK, that one's optional." [Hops continues to write stuff down on the list. Just then, Lily shows up by the doorway with her storybook.] Lily: "Lana read me bedtime story?" [Lana gasps in excitement as Lily walks up to her, handing the book to her older sister] Lana: "Aww! Really? You wanna hang out with me again already?" [Lily responds by taking Lana's cap and putting it on her head, in which she then nods. Lana and Lily scoot closer to one another as she proceeds to read from the book, all while Hops joins in to watch them] Lana: "Once upon a time-" Lola:[off-screen]"LANA!!" [All three of them become startled as the camera pans to downstairs. An angry Lola kicks open the door, holding a shovel while covered in dirt] Lola:[furiously as she throws the shovel on the ground] "I had to tunnel my way out of that play castle!" [Cut back upstairs, with Lana, Lily and Hops still in shock] Lana:[fearfully] "Lily, new game. It's called pretend you're asleep!" [Lana pulls the cover over herself, Lily and Hops, all pretending to be asleep]
