The Loud House Encyclopedia
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The Loud House Encyclopedia
S1E02B Lincoln observes his empty trophy case I've tried everything to get into this trophy case.
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The following is a transcript for "Vantastic Voyage".

[The episode begins with Rita inside Vanzilla]
Rita: [calls to the kids] "Okay, kids, steady as she goes."
[The Loud kids are all pushing the van, except for Lola, who stands on top of the van while waving]
Lori: "Lola, you are not in a parade! Get down here and help us push!"
[But Lola ignores her and continues waving]
Lincoln: [grunting]] "Mom, this is the third time Vanzilla's broken down this week. Don't you think it might be time for a new van?"
Rita: "I would love a new car, guys. It's your dad who won't go for it." [flashback of Lynn Sr.'s dad with Vanzilla] "Vanzilla was his father's van." [Another flashback of Lynn Sr.'s grandfather with Vanzilla] "And his grandfather's." [Cut back to the present day] "Someday, he hopes to pass it onto you, Lincoln."
[Lincoln stops as his sisters laugh at him but starts walking again. Soon, they arrive back at the Loud House but Lola is no longer on top of the van]
Rita: "Thanks for the assist, kids. Err, after dinner, I'll need a push to Ceramics class."
[The siblings all groan]
Lynn: "There's gotta be some way we can convince Dad to get a new car."
Luan: "You heard Mom. All our arguments are just going to stall." [laughs] "Get it?"
Lincoln: "Unless we try the subliminal approach."
Sisters: "Mmm-hmm!"
Lucy: "Wait! Where's Lola?"
Lola: [walks up with a couple of twigs in her hair and two black eyes] "I got knocked off by a tree branch three blocks back! Thanks for noticing!"


[Later Lynn is making pancakes whilst Lucy brings a plate over to Lynn Sr.]
Lucy: "Here you go, Dad." [a close up reveals the pancakes to be shaped like a new van] "We made you "Brand New Van-Cakes"."
[Lynn Sr. gasps excitedly and starts eating them]
Lana: "Is that a new shirt, Dad? You look vantastic."
Luna: "Yeah, you're the van.
Lynn Sr.: "Thanks guys."
Lincoln: [pops up with a napkin] "Oops. Got a little hood ornament on your face."
[Lynn Sr. takes the napkin and starts wiping his face whilst Lincoln and Luna wink at each other]


[Lori pretends to be doing homework when Lynn Sr. enters the room, whistling to himself]
Lori: "Dad, could you help me with this maths problem? If Mr. Cloud's van stalls out ten miles from his office, how late will Mr. Cloud be for his important meeting?"
Lynn Sr.: "Well, based on my experience from last Tuesday, I'd say about three hours. [chuckling] "And boy, is he going to stink!"
Lori: "Thanks, dad."
Lynn Sr.: [winks] "No problem, sweetie." [walks off, whistling to himself]


[The next morning, Lynn Sr. wakes up to a glorious aroma]
Lynn Sr.: "Whoa, Nelly? What is that glorious smell? It's like warm bread, roses and puppies all rolled into one."
Lisa: [holding a bottle of perfume] "Just my latest experiment: I've recreated the intoxicating new car smell."
Lynn Sr.: [excited] "Wait, new cars smell like this? I had no idea! I don't know what's come over me but I suddenly think it's time the Louds got a new minivan."
[Rita and the other siblings, except for Lola and Lana, enter the room, cheering in delight. Just then, the twins enter the room with a cardboard recreation of the van]
Lana: "Lola and I have been working on a new song. It's called "Happiness is a New Van"."
Lincoln: "Can it. He already said yes."
Lola: "We've been practicing for FOUR HOURS! SIT DOWN!" [Lincoln, feeling scared, complies] "And a one, and a two! A one, two, three, four!"


[Later, the kids and Rita hear a blaring car horn and a brand new van pulls up onto the drive. They gasp in awe as the window lowers to reveal Lynn Sr.]
Lynn Sr.: "Ain't she a beaut? I fell in love the minute I took her for a test drive. Check it out." [brings out a remote which he uses to open the door. The kids and Rita excitedly rush up to their brand new van, but Lynn Sr. intentionally presses a button on the remote that closes the door, causing the kids and Rita to slam onto the van and fall over] [tutting] "Not so fast. This van is brand new and I wanna keep it that way. Shoes off! From now on you wear these booties." [holds a pair of booties] "Now line up for inspection."
[nighttime]
Lynn Sr.: [holding a clipboard] "Aha, so no history of flaking skin, projectile vomiting, or leaky bone Syndrome." [turns to Lana] "You may enter."
[Lana dashes into the van and closes the sliding door. Lynn Sr. gets in the van.]
Lynn Sr.: "Okay, gang! Let's take it for a ride!" [starts the van and backs off the driveway, but unfortunately he drives it back] "Everybody out! Don't smudge the door handles."
[Rita and the Loud children complain about the very short ride they had.]
Lynn Sr.: "Now guys, we don't want to rack up the mileage on Veronica."
Lincoln: "Who?"
Lynn Sr.: "Oh, that's the name I gave my little baby. Now, everybody out!"
[The kids and Rita get out of the car, feeling annoyed. Just as Lynn Sr. gets out and closes the door, Lori comes back] Lori: "Dad, can I borrow erm...Veronica tomorrow?"
Lynn Sr. [laughs but realizes] "Oh, wait! You're serious? Oh, sorry, honey, no one drives her but me."
Rita: "And me, of course."
Lynn Sr. [laughs again but realizes] "Oh, wait! You're serious too?"
[Lori and Rita just walk away, feeling annoyed]

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